2012: January - August

17
Jan
…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I don’t watch any of the reality shows like Bachelor or Bachelorette, Real Housewives, Mob Wives… unless Tabitha is over lounging around after a run.

Yesterday we got sucked into Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. I got sucked in because I had been cleaning most of the morning and I needed a break and it

was on.
They had these women, who in comparison to some of the shows I have been forced to watched, were somewhat stable.
They are all from sort of famous background, but I had no idea who or what because I don’t subscribe to most of that. If you’re not on my Twitter feed, I had

no idea what you’re doing, who you’re married to…
This one woman; older, classy…and well put together with a cool accent was watching this other housewife who was a lot younger, no class and not so put

together put her hand around her husband’s shoulder.
It looked harmless enough, but the classy woman came unhinged for a moment.
“Get your hands off my husband.”
I actually cheered for her.

If I have learned anything in my life being on both side of this story, is this…if you want to keep what you have….GET UNHINGED.

We don’t get out too much with other people, but if and when we do and some woman is brave enough to get even a little bit flirty with my man, I will let her

know that she can back the fuck right up and kick rocks.

This is mine…and you can’t have it.

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16
Jan
“and I was like, KA-POW!”
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


“and I was like, KA-POW!”, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

This weekend I got to take Birdie and Mara out on a hike.
WELL, I got to take them out on a half hike, because shortly after this picture was taken where we were all laughing and joking, Tabitha sprinted up a hill and

the shit hit the fan.

We had been walking for about two miles when Tabitha decided to sprint and about 10 feet up this hill, I saw her hit the ground and scream, “Mother Fucker!”.

Tabitha doesn’t cuss on hikes (minus the trip we did training hill) and certainly not on Sunday. I thought she fell so I made my way up to her to see her

clutching her leg.
“IT POPPED! SOMETHING POPPED!” I thought she broke her leg. She let me know she didn’t and that she did something to the muscle in her calf. Oh shit.

Dan took Mara and Birdie over Robie and down trailbed and I hobbled Tabitha back to the car.

Even with the blinding pain she did so good. We stopped at one point and a family came up and a man and his wife offered to piggy back her back to the car.

She gracefully declined and we kept on going…slowly. We laughed on the way back to the car more than we have laughed in a long time and with as much

pain she was in, I didn’t think that would be possible.
At one point a handsome man, and I mean HAWT guy rides up on a horse and offers to give her a ride back to the car. She declined ever so gracefully and he

was off, bewildered why she would decline. I even had to ask her, “Why did you say no! I could have ran behind you!” She shyly stated, “I don’t ride with

strangers.” Pointing out, “I’m injured, he knows I can’t run away!!”
But it was part of the joy of her Pixie Dust…good looking men and horses, she happened to get both in one.

We made our way further down the trail and we got her through the roughest part of the trail which is a waterfall in a deep cut in the canyon, shimming down

to the waterfall and over the rocks. I managed to get her up the steep hill without even stopping.
This was the second blessing of the trip. I egged her on, “you’re almost there. you got this. we are almost done. keep moving.” and I could hear all the times

she had cheered me on when I was certain I couldn’t make it. There was a time when I couldn’t get up that hill without stopping twice. Now I can do it nearly

carrying someone. Not only did she learn something about herself, but I learned something about myself…I’m one strong chick.

We walked on, laughing at the fact that we were laughing in such a stupid situation. Then blessing three came running down the trail.
“you okay?” the woman running was wearing a 50 mile endurance wicking shirt and a Western States 100 mile endurance run hat. She was in her 60’s. She

was a woman. Sweet baby Jesus, what more could I ask for!? We chatted a bit where I asked her 500 rapid fire question and she answered every one. She

headed on the way and I stopped and looked at Tabitha. “OH MY GOD! Seriously? What the fuck!?!” We just laughed at the fact that a handsome man on a

horse showed up for her, a WS100 runner showed up for me. I couldn’t even imagine what more her Pixie Dust could provide!
“Okay, since we both got everything we can ask for, I’m just going to fuck with the pixie dust and ask to see like, Elton John and Richard Simmons.”

Yes, it was a fucked up situation, but one of the best trips out on that trail I have had in a whole year.
Dan, Mara and Birdie made their way back around to us and knowing Tabitha was taken care of, I asked if I could please run. I took off down the hill and

across No Hands Bridge.

Our time for a 4 mile “hike” was 3 hours. I will PROUDLY clock that time!

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15
Jan
one of three hikes this weekend
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


my two men., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

I had a fantastic hike yesterday with Lester and his son. It was another hike I was getting time on my Vibrams. It might not have been the best idea to wear

them on a trail I know was too rocky, but I thought I was ready. Today my feet are a little on the tender side and hooooo boy do my legs feel it. It’s crazy how a

shoe can make all the difference in using leg muscles you don’t normally use.

Today I am taking out a few friends to do a hike. It’s going to be maybe 8 miles max. It’s the once a month/two months invite people to hike and not kill them

with running. I will of course make them run, but it’s really for their own good. ;)

I plan on doing the MLK march down town on Monday. I’ve always wanted to do it, so it should be great!

In an attempt to get my friend Mark off the couch this year I had to incorporate my evil plan with his brothers evil plan.
My plan was to get Mark to run a 5k with me. Simple enough. Well, apparently his brother is a little bit more evil than I am. I had to up the evil level a notch

and decided to see if I could Mark to run in an all woman’s half marathon. His brother said he would…with a little more gusto than I thought he was capable

of. After all the fanfare it would seem that Mark would run in this wearing all pink, a boa and tiara.
The next day I figured I would be nice to my friend and make it very simple. Half marathon, at night and at the end he can have a metal that glows in the dark.

The best part is he doesn’t really have to drive anywhere, it’s in his area.
I will be happy to see these two brothers run together in this half.

During our hike I thought of a bunch of things that Lester and I could do this year and I’m excited to start the planning. It’s going to require a retarded amount

of sunblock though.

:)

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13
Jan
Letter from Birmingham Jail….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
It is my that time of year that I start reading my favorite piece of writing I have ever read.
Every year I sit down and dedicate an hour or two to really reading it and this year as I read it, I am in a different place than I have ever been while reading it.

A few years ago when I read it, it was during Prop 8 and it touched me to read his words and see how he spoke for the people of today and their crisis even

though this letter was written in the 60’s about a completely different issue.
Today I am reading “Letter from Birmingham Jail” and I am seeing my life and how, perhaps, it relates on a personal level.

The letter written in 1963 was in response to a letter published in the local paper, though thinly veiled, stating that outsiders(MLK jr) were coming in and

causing tension and they felt they were concerned for the community with such words as, “We recognize the natural impatience of people who feel their hopes

are slow in being realized.”

MLK jr. replies with a letter that is so well written in response, it makes me cry.  I want to know, was it really read?
Ho w many times have I spoke out for my very own needs to have them dismissed and not really heard? Too many times.
I read something that said, “Fair is where you get cotton candy.”  This to me at first was humorous, then hurtful.  Yes, there are people that say, “that isn’t

fair.” And to which I want to say, “That’s life.”   What a shallow thing for me to even think.  Fair is relative.  For me, fair means that each person has a say in

how they will be treated. They will get the respect that they have earned.
Look around you, is there someone in your life that has treated you with respect? Have they been understanding and actually listened to you when you spoke

your needs? If you have someone in your life that has given you that fairness, count that as the biggest blessing you have been given.  Through those actions

you learned self esteem and hopefully have been able to give that in return, not only to the person that gave it to you, but those around you.

MLK spoke of tension which led me to focus more directly on my life.  In every friendship and relationship there will be tension.  For any growth there must

be tension and how you deal with that is what is going to make or break the friendship or relationship.
MLK said there are four separate actions that need to be taken. First collect the facts to see if an injustice has been committed.
What he is speaking of is way more profound than anything that I have in my life, but for my purpose I have to think of the situation I am dealing with and

because I am a woman…it comes down to my feelings.   Is what I am feeling completely irrational? It’s “feelings” so it could go either way.  I began with

sitting back and thinking about what I feel like when certain actions or words take place and it is more of an annoyance than an injustice.   When I sit quietly

with myself without the distractions and dig deeper, I listen to what the actions or inactions are really saying to me.  Sometimes I will hear “let it go.” And

other times I can physically feel how damaging it is to not address it.
The next step is negotiation. Here is where the problem looms for me.  I will stand up for myself, but only after allowing myself to get pushed really far.  This

comes from not wanting confrontation.  I don’t talk about it a lot here, but I grew up in an alcoholic family.  I am not unfamiliar with yelling, screaming,

throwing things and irrational name calling.  Please don’t think for a second that my parents do not regret every single negative word and action during those

times, because they do and they have changed their lives tenfold and I do not blame anything that happens in my life on my childhood, I am just stating why I

feel like I personally don’t like confrontation.
If you have ever heard me fight back with you, loudly or even threaten physical violence then you have tapped into something that not a lot of people will ever

see and they should fear it, because I do.  That side of me doesn’t come out very often.  It’s an ugly side that serves no purpose but to break me.
I’m a negotiator when it comes to finding a fair balance.
For example if I am wearing a perfume that makes you feel sick and you come to me and say, “that choice of perfume is annoying me, it makes me

uncomfortable.”  I am certain you won’t ever smell it on me again.  Now if that is my absolute favorite scent in my collection and I have never had complaints

before and only compliments I am going to have to negotiate with that person.  I won’t wear it if I know we will be spending time together.   This person isn’t

asking me to throw my bottle in the trash and never wear it again; they are simply expressing their needs.  I can totally respect that and it’s a fair negotiation

in my eyes.
Most of the time…it doesn’t go that way with me.  I express what I am feeling or need and then I wait to see what route the other person will take.  This leads to

nothing ever really happening and I have to decide what is important, my needs and feelings or the good of everyone else and their needs.  Sadly, I always

pick everyone else, because I don’t want to fight…and that is what negotiation to some. It’s a fight where they can see who can get cuss the loudest or say the

meanest thing to shut the other person up. For some, negotiation is a way to make the other person feel like they are wrong or irrational.


That leads us into the third step which is self purification.  I think this is where through the years the most of the growth I have had has been.  It has always

felt that bouncing back from situations took longer than I could patiently sit through.  Through removing the toxic situations from my life and finding a

healthy way to happiness I am able to recover more quickly from a situation I would once be heartbroken over.
During my second marriage I would have the same conversation over and over with my husband.  So many times it walked us right into marriage counseling.

I am certain he heard me the first time I brought up the situation I had found because we talked for hours and hours about it and how there were things I could

tolerate and others I would not stand for.  Then it happened again. We talked for hours and hours…well, he mostly talked…I just sat there in complete

disbelief that he would do it again after the hours of sitting up into the early morning hours discussing it before.  It wouldn’t happen again. It did…and I kept

hearing myself say all the things I had said before and somewhere throughout the years I finally stopped talking.
This isn’ t healthy.  I finally went all the way back to the very beginning and analyzed how I had gotten to where I was. Answer: I didn’t want to be his ex wife. I

wanted to be the cool understanding new wife that was super understanding and show him I wasn’t like his ex.  Well, there came a point when I figured out why

his ex was like she was.  She had been super cool and understanding until she finally sat down with herself and saw that his actions and words were

damaging her self esteem.  She probably had a conversation with him and expressed herself clearly on her wants and needs. I am almost 100% he listened

and said he would respect them.  Then he faltered. She had the conversation again. He promised, and broke that promise.
You see, I had gotten to the point where I wasn’t even going to have the conversation anymore and that is when our marriage truly ended.  Our marriage

ended long before he walked out, it ended when he came home one day and could clearly see that there was something wrong and I had given up on

speaking.  He sat there and par to ever other conversation it went like this, “You ok?”  and I said, “Yep.” No, I wasn’t, but I wasn’t going to say, “hey, guess

what I found” one more to that man.  He then got mad at me because there was something wrong and I wouldn’t tell him.  My thought at that moment was, “I

have had this conversation with you a hundred times and if you didn’t hear it the 100 times before, you will never hear it so shut the fuck up and let me figure

out how the hell I am going to ‘get over this’ so I can find my own happiness all while making sure our kids aren’t hurting.”

Because of the things that happened in my marriages and even relationships, I have fast tracked myself to self purification and it goes something just like

this, “Kristine are you pissed? Yes? Is it for a good reason? Yes? Okay then…have you talked to him/her about it? No? well then you need to sit down and

express how you are feeling and see what happens. Oh you did talk to him/her about it and it got turned around back to you? Okay…did you give it a day to

simmer down and then you negotiated a reasonable compromise? No, they just pretended it didn’t happen.  Okay…here’s the plan of action, GET THE FUCK

OUT.”
Yeah,  I see how unhealthy it is, but how many more years do I have to waste expressing my needs and feelings to only haven them shoved back at me as if

they are irrational?
My time is valuable and there are people that respect that.

So that leads into the last thing MLK jr speaks of. Direct action.

Before I ever go to direct action I re-examine the situation.
1. Did I express myself and needs clearly?
2. Was I heard or was the situation then turned back onto me?
3. Was that action deserved and was your response heard?
4. Is that person willing to negotiate a fair settlement and actually stick to it?

Every year I read that letter from start to finish and each year it brings tears to my eyes to think of how he poured out his heart to be heard, to address the

statements and claims that had been made against him and his fellow brothers and sisters.  It makes me sad because I know that letter was never truly

received by the people intended.  I imagine the person picked up the letter, began to read and felt uncomfortable and angered that someone would begin to

express how they felt because of an action that they were directly involved with.   If it is going to take away from something they hold dear to and they aren’t

willing to change or modify then it will anger them.
I’m afraid they read the first few paragraphs, got angry and just skimmed to the end.

Perhaps, they didn’t hear it. I did. I do every single year and this year I with a different heart.  With a different focus.
Happiness and success isn’t ever going to meet you were you’re comfortable.  I know that time doesn’t heal all, what you choose to do with that time plays a

role in it.

Again, my time is precious and valuable and I don’t want to waste another minute of it on people that blame me for their life not turning out the way they

thought it should turn out.  Guess what? Mine didn’t turn out the way I thought it was going to either. Poor planning on my part, I didn’t know what I wanted,

but I sure the fuck know I didn’t want to ever feel like I should be lied to.  I sure the fuck didn’t want the person I trusted my children with to destroy everything

I fought to get.  And I certainly don’t want to be told for fucks sake to knock it off when I express myself.

There are people that will have to be in my life and to them I say show me the respect I have earned.  I do not feel guilt for the things that happened in the

past. I don’t live there anymore. I forgave myself years ago and I moved on so you can’t use those threats anymore. They do not work on me and they take all

that I have worked for and make me feel like you did nothing but use me.

There are people that I want in my life, forever.  To those I say, I love you..always will… and I hope you figure out a way to treat me with the respect that I have

shown you and earned from you.  I hope you see what I want out of what is left of my life isn’t irrational and situations can be negotiated for both people to be

happy.

I am so worth that.

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07
Jan
5 miles down, 5 miles up!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Happy he made it the 5 miles down!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Lester finally got to see one of my favorite trails today.
This is the ten miler that can break your spirit if you’re not ready for it. It’s 1200 feet of elevation loss and gain…and his spirit was nicely intact by the time we

got back up to the truck.

He did fantastic on the Resolution run and I knew he would do great today.

We went out the other day and he got his Camelbak and some trail mix.

I am so thankful that he is joining me out in my weekend playground and interested in doing some of the runs I have planned for this upcoming year.

At the end of January it will be my hiking and trail running birthday and I am going back to where it all started!

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05
Jan
So sad…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I am heartbroken.

RIP Robert and Linda.

Thank you for all your words, emails and encouragement this last year. You were an amazing couple with thousands of people who have nothing but nice

things to say about you and all that you did for them.

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04
Jan
Journey into 2012
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Hike 1, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.



I have been a little freaked out over 2012. Since 2011 was such an amazing year for me, I’m afraid that 2012 won’t even compare. Every time I get a little

freaked out about it, I remember that 2011 didn’t make itself good, I made it good. The work I put into it was exactly what I got out of it.

The start to this year has been slow. A few things have been already thrown my way and my anxiety level has been through the roof. Again, I am the only one

that can fix them, but the desire to hide under the covers has been stronger than my desire to get outside and fix it.

On the first of the year, Lester ran his first 5k. He did so much better than I could have ever imagined. I’m still trying to figure out how I got him to agree to do

the 5k, but I am 100% certain it didn’t involve a tattoo. Joking with him I said, “You run a marathon with me and I will get another tattoo.” Now this is one I am

certain he can’t hold me to!

On Sunday morning we headed up to where I do the majority of my trail runs and hiking. I usually fill up my camelbak up all the way for a whole day hike, so I

only filled it up half way for a short 3 miler. This turned out to be a mistake as I ran out of water only a mile in. Forgetting to calculate in the 3 glasses of wine

I had the night before was stupid as I was much thirstier than I had thought I would be.
The director of the race didn’t have any portapotties and we were reduced to 1 bathroom with 3 toilets which only one worked. I got back to the starting line

right as the race was starting. We took off in a fast paced walk and then picked up to a slow jog. As we were still on the highway part of the run, I was passed

by a man running with a horse. Only in Auburn would you see this.
The downhill grade was ridiculous and not what either one of us had planned for. A mile downhill should have been an indicator that we would be running

uphill at a similar grade.
The day before we had gone on a small hike where I wore my Vibrams to get my leg muscles conditioned for further running in them. I was almost certain we

wouldn’t be doing any running because Lester had just gotten his shoes and we also brought his 6 year old son. I was wrong. Lester and his son took off and

I took it slow watching in awe as they were enjoying their time outside.
Again, this little hike/run would play a part in the pain I would be in by the time we hit the uphill slop in the race. I did okay the first couple of hills because I

was stretching out the calf muscles by making long strides. Lester seemed eager to take on the hills and I told him to run ahead and that I would catch up,

maybe, probably not.
The trail flattened out a little bit and I stopped for a few seconds to do some serious stretching. My calf muscles were screaming at me, but I pushed on to the

next hill. Somewhere near mile two a long hill with a flat surface at the top showed itself and I decided to sprint up it. I did and when I reached the top my calf

decided it was done. The only sensation I can compare it to is being hit in the back of the leg with a orange that had been heated to lava degree in the

microwave.
Fearing being pulled from the race for limping, I did my best to get through it and took it very slow.
At the very end of the race where you come up out of the canyon I saw Lester walking towards me. Yay, I was almost done.
“Hand me your camelbak.” He took it from me and handed me his bottle of water, “You want to run it in?” All I could think was running it in to the aid station.

I got through it and never located the aid station. Using the cold sidewalk to ice my leg was the best that I could do.

My time has never been important to me, but crossing the line and seeing 1:05 I was a little peeved, but in that same second I was proud of Lester because

that means his time was going to be so much better.
I tried to explain to him that if he did a conventional 5k without those massive hills, his time would have blown him away. He was happy with the hills though

and that just shows me how well he will do out on the trails with me in this coming year.
He did unbelievably well with only a week to prepare for his first race. There are a few more on the calendar for 2012, but I promised to not push him. I’ll have

him on the weekends with me and that is more than this girl could have hoped for.

I have a list of things I want to do this year.
1. Climb Castle Crag in Shasta County.
2. Half Dome in Yosemite.
3. Lose another 40lbs
4. Walk or run across the Golden Gate
5. Learn how to rock climb

I’m not sure how many of these I will get to do, but I have my goals set and I know the journey to my goals is what is going to make 2012 as wonderful as the

last.

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15
Feb
stupid smiling all day…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random




I can’t remember a better Valentine’s day than last nights.

Last year he made it clear what he thought of Valentine’s day and I made it clear that I heard him and understand and believe just like he does, but I needed it

to be acknowledged.

Last night made up for all the shitty Valentine’s days I have had in my life. He managed to make it un-Hallmarky, we made It what we wanted it to be and I

don’t think we even knew how much fun we would have.

I’m almost 100% certain I have never made out with someone like a teenager for that many hours. Between the talking, sharing, kissing and laughing, I can

say I have never been more in love than I am today.

Thank you, Fucktard…I love you so much!

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14
Feb
Shit Trail Runners say…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Well…this trail runner at least.

Here are some of the things heard while trail running in 2011 and 2012.

1. LIFE FLIGHT!
2.  I’m making wrong choices.
3. Keep up, Catch up or Shut up.
4. I’m not good at crossing over streams on rocks, I just run through it.
5. Holy shit, that horse stunk!
6. Oh Gawd, I need to clean out my camelbak bladder, this tastes like shit!
7. IS SHE REALLY SKIPPING UP THAT DAMN HILL?
8. *singing Indiana Jones theme music*
9. *singing Rocky theme music*
10. Where’s the grassy knoll ?
11. Pee break, watch out for snakes, ticks and poison oak.
12. You think that guy saw my ass when I was peeing?
13. How many miles to the car and from that point how many miles to the beer?
14. Give me your Ipod! you know better than that!
15. What is it? DON’T EAT IT IF YOU DON’T KNOW!
16. can you get my chomps out of my camelbak?
17. I’m impressed with you ability to remove your clothing and put it away without stopping your pace.
18. really? a 20 minute mile? how big was that hill?
19. Bug spray anyone?
20. I can’t feel my toes anymore.
21. How many layers ARE you wearing??!!
22. Ouch! Fucking blackberry bushes!
23. No, it doesn’t look like it’s a trail, but it looks like it might get us where we need to go.
24. You brought toilet paper? Oh that’s cute.  rookie.
25. Yes, I have the snake bite kit with me.
26. So which way now? We have been running lost for the last 4 miles, what’s another 21 miles?
27. Why do we never pack the map? someone should be in charge of the damn map!
28. The book said to look for the small tree that grows into the bigger tree and go left. no right. wait. shit.
29. Sour gummy lifesaver anyone?
30. OH THANK GOD, I know where we are now!!
31. That’s probably going to leave a bruise! get up and keep moving…it will help.
32. i hate this. i wanna go home.
33. HOLY CRAP, look at that rain!! I didn’t realize it was raining so hard!
34. hmmm…this trail looks familiar.
35. Did he REALLY just run that far ahead of me? I hope I get attacked by a mountain lion. That will teach him. oh wait.
36. hold on, my gps is still searching for satellites.
37. brought down by a damn sticker !!
38. It’s so quiet. Well, it would be if you would stop talking.
39. run to the top of the hill?
40. Did you hear that movement in the trees?

I’m ready for another year of this with the old friends, new ones and my boyfriend.

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13
Feb
…much too young.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
For all of you that has read Random and Odd and held my hand while I battled through my Anxiety disorder, you’ll understand this.  Those of you that just got

on the Random and Odd train, you’ll have to just play along.

The first thing I hear on the news is Whitney Houston had xanax in her hotel room.
OH SHOCKING, like I didn’t see that coming.  The bigger question today is what celebrity doesn’t have a bottle of xanax?
It pisses me off how easy it is for people to get it.  Just say they have anxiety and poof they get a prescription.
I went through classes, books and countless therapy sessions to just be able to understand why I had it and not that I ever beat anxiety, but I can at least

manage it now.
How many of the people that have a bottle of xanax have had to go through all that I have to be able to take it?  They are not tit tac candy, people!

Do I understand why people would want to be on xanax? Yes, I do.  Having a rough time of it today? take a xanax and it will ‘take the edge off’.
TAKE THE EDGE OFF.  No, it’s not a ‘take the edge off’ pill.  This pill was designed for people with an anxiety disorder.  People who have the flight or fight

switch broken. It’s a chemical imbalance.
It is not a pill to give to people who can’t fucking cope with the stress of a rough day.

It’s been several years that I have openly admitted to having an anxiety disorder and when my world flipped over and I got a whole new set of friends I had to

decide which route I was going to take.  Do I admit to what I have and risk being laughed at or do I shut up and deal with it alone?
I decided to take the middle road.  It’s simply because the battle of coping with anxiety is over.  I’ve learned what I need to do to be able to get through the

small and medium sized anxiety attacks.   Telling Lester about the big ones scared the shit out of me because I wasn’t sure how he would handle the

information.   He seemed to take it okay and I told him that they are rare when they hit, but when they do, I would tell him and coached him on what he can do

to help me.
That is really all I can do.

I take xanax.  Not everyday anymore.

Thank god.

I’ve found that when I feel them starting to coming on, I take a half a  pill and I do this for a couple of days to get the xanax in my system and I’m okay for a

week or two.   It’s like pain management, don’t let the pain get so bad that you take a bunch to get rid of it.

Xanax is a serious drug that should only be prescribed after having to go through all that I had to go through to get it.  I took a six week class. I took months

of therapy talking about it. I read 2 books on the disorder an how to manage it.  Was this enough?  I’m still alive.
Have I fucked up and taken it with other stuff? Yes. I have.  I was reading the list of pills in Heath Ledger’s system and how they speculate due to the autopsy

when he took the list of pills.  Nothing he took wasn’t anything I didn’t have in my medicine cabinet and battling insomnia I know that train he climbed on…

take a prescription pill, didn’t work so take a over the counter. didn’t work yet, take another over the counter…nothing…okay time to call in the big boy.

nothing yet. one more over the counter.  It’s INSANE what I would do just to get some sleep.  NEVER did I think I was going to overdose and I could have.  It

would have been a tragic mistake of taking one more over the counter or just one more prescription.

Moral of the story…xanax isn’t shit that you need to be joking about.  It’s not a fix all drug. It’s not a sleeping pill.
Yes, it helps you sleep. It’s not designed for that.
Yes, it will take the edge off a stressful day. It was not designed for that though.
Yes, it will help you through a panic attack…but truly the ACTUAL amount of people that have an anxiety attack don’t need to take xanax.  They can get

through it without it, I did for YEARS and I had them up to 4 times a day…full blown freak out, should be hospitalized, scare people kind of anxiety attacks.
It wasn’t designed to be given out like candy for the people who have had one or ‘short of breath’ scared feeling sometimes.
Oh fuck it, what hell do I know?

I feel horrible for the Houston family, just like I felt bad for the Ledgers and the Smith families.

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11
Feb
take my hand.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


take my hand., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Today I am heading out to run with the ex’s. This is the first hike since Tabitha blew out her calf. We will be taking it slow as we have the Little Man with us and

we know he can do up to 5 miles, but after that he gets pissy.

I plan on running in memory of Sherry Arnold today. (Read story here)

I found a new artist that I am addicted to. Her voice is so haunting. She’s a British artist so no chance in hell of seeing her play live any day soon, but love her

regardless. He name is Laura Marling. She just reaches in and grips me.

Last month is the one year point of Lester and getting back together after a 4 month hiatus. Valentine’s day is around the corner and to say he hates that day

is a canyon size understatement. After last year’s mess where I was almost certain I would never talk to his ass ever again, I have decided that this year I will

ready myself for the onslaught of how much this day sucks and the Tasmanian Devil approach to expressing how much he hates this day. I have even almost

decided to just expect to not hear from him.

…and if i don’t he won’t hear from me. just sayin.

I added a few new posts to the Barefoot Trail Running blog. I added a few new people to the Run A 5k in 2012 blog.

Yeah, 2012 is sounding pretty boring so far, time to kick up the heat a bit!

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08
Feb
;-)
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
In my forever attempt to try new things, I have been looking up things to do online.
Rock climbing, ballroom dancing, Zumba, first aid classes, kayak lessons….

I’m a bitch too…here is a text between Lester and I.

Me: looking up beginner bike trails.
(no response)
Me: Hey, they have the AARP drivers safety program.
Lester: SHUT
Lester: THE
Lester: FUCK
Lester: UP

Hee hee. Either he was really excited that I thought of him and they have a program he’s nearly eligible for….or he’s telling me to shut the fuck up.

can’t.stop.giggling.

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03
Feb
so cold…so freaking cold.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Last night I sat outside for awhile trying to get through level 17 of this stupid game on my phone.  When I came in my feet were so cold they physically ached.
It was a good thing that Lester was there.  For those of you that remember our sleeping habits, you’ll be happy to know he didn’t kill me last night.
The fan was on and his blanket was pulled all the way up to his ears. Ohhhh, yes, he will be nice and warm.  I crawled into bed and as soon as my feet hit my

sheets, I knew I was fucked. I was TOO cold to cuddle.  If I get within 5 inches of his molten hot skin, he will detect the temperature change and go into body

blocking defensive mode.  No, I was too cold. I would need to warm up before I dare try.  Rub feet on sheets to generate heat.
Lester has this thing with my feet moving.
He hates it.
My first two husbands didn’t really care much.   The first was just happy to have an 18 year old girl willing to be in the same bed, I could have had 5 legs

moving and he would have smiled like a loon.   My second ex  had the same feet moving problem I do.  From the ankles up we looked totally normal, but our

feet were moving like we were two ducks swimming up stream.
Lester is about to go all Misery on me every time I start moving my feet.
When I got into bed my foot started rubbing on the sheet and he actually stopped snoring, sat up on his elbow and said, “I just rolled over on my arm, but it

didn’t feel like my arm.”  and then went back to sleep.
I’m almost 99% certain it had nothing to do with me moving my feet, but he has this weird ability to detect when my feet are moving so I am going to say it

was my feeties fault that he was sleep talking.

I decided that if I could move just one toe, I would be alright.  He detected the toe movement with his foot and grabbed hold of my foot with both of his feet.

This was the point where he felt how cold I was.   I keep forgetting that his body temp runs about 1000 degrees higher than everyone else and something cold

is a good vacation to cuddle up to.  He pulled me, groaning and sighing as he got comfortable.   Oh. My. God he was so warm, but he wouldn’t let my feet

touch his legs because they were too cold.
I moved my foot just a little bit closer to his legs and I could feel the heat radiating off of him and I almost wept because I was THAT cold and it would feel so

good to just…..so I did. I took both feet and shoved them on his legs.   He didn’t even move.   Within minutes my feet were warm and he was done cuddling,

he pushed me away and flopped onto his stomach resuming his snoring.

“You’re welcome feetsies for picking the best boyfriend for you.  I know he hates it when you have to move around so much, but he keeps us all warm.”

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30
Jan
Not well thought out…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


IMAG0572, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

I totally didn’t think there would be that much snow on the trail. Honest.

It was almost 4 miles and maybe 14 steps of that weren’t in snow/ice/slush.

Regardless of the pain, this was my 1 year hiking/trail running anniversary…so *HIGH FIVE* go me, yay me, go me!

Barefoot Trail Running Blog
For the whole story of the trail.

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25
Jan
oh thank god!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
went online to see if i could find a video from 2005. thought it might be on my vimeo or my youtube. not there.  i even checked tyler’s youtube. nope.

maybe it was here.

i had to read through a few posts.

THANK YOU GOD i am not that person anymore. the anxiety parts of my life are manageable.  the toxin has been purged. i am so much happier.

it’s just so strange so many of those years, i saw it…i even wrote about it. why didn’t i save myself?

i will NEVER be that scared again. ever.

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23
Jan
That’ll probably hurt tomorrow…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
 Elevation Gain:1,288 ft Elevation Loss:1,298 ft MinElevation:541 ft MaxElevation:1,208 ft

I got my Garmin up and running and have been playing with it non-stop.  Last week when Tabitha blew her calf out I got home and uploaded the information.

It laughed at me.

Today I got to take it out again and I got all the settings on it ALMOST perfect.  It was a great start of the hike/run.  We took it slow and then when the rain

started coming down in sheets, we picked up the pace.

When I got home and checked all my stats I was over the moon excited that for the first time I beat my goal per mile time!
Tomorrow I start my half marathon training.  I love that the program starts me out slow, but I am way past that beginner place, but if I am going to do it right,

starting at the beginning is what I am going to do.  To be honest, i’m only a smidgen certain I am going to actually do the half.  The thing is, it’s on pavement

and I loathe running on the pavement.  Today was the perfect reminder of that as we were driving up to where we trail run we passed a bunch of people doing

a race. Even though it winds through a less urban area, it’s still a bike trail and no matter what direction you look you see buildings and hear cars.  Whenever

I see people running on the street I actually feel bad for them.  Don’t they know that just a little bit up the road there are amazing, muddy, soggy trails with

giant hills and a million rocks?
Okay, so that might not sound appealing to everyone, but as soon as my feet hit the mud I get giddy like a little girl.
Since Lester started running with me, I try to hold back the little kid  in me.  There are times when I want to squeal, “YAYYYYYYYYYY!! LOOK AT WHERE WE

ARE? ISN’T THIS BEAUTIFUL!!???”   I might have done that a few times today, but he couldn’t hear me because sheets of rain was pelting us for 3 solid miles

and he lost his sense of adventure the last time I got him lost and tried to convince him I wasn’t.

I was telling him about a few things and people I had met on the trail. ” I met a lady that ran the Western States 100 mile endurance run! WE WEAR THE SAME

SHOES!! I met a guy once with a dog that if he stops running the dog starts barking madly at him to keep him moving.  Last week I am pretty certain these two

trail runners saw my ass when I was peeing!”   Low and behold I saw ALL THREE of the people on the trail again today.  The guy with the dog was the most

exciting.  He stopped to help redirect me in the right direction and the dog started going crazy. “LESTER! THIS IS THE DOG!!”
I know I use the word magical a lot when describing my time out on my trails, but it always seems to fit…well, except the two guys seeing my ass. Not so

magical.

On another note, somewhat related, but not really…I got the outline to my book started.  Friday night I heard a song on the radio that reminded me of a book I

started when I was about 17 years old.  The book is since long gone, probably stored somewhere at my dad’s house.  It got me to thinking about a book I do

want to write and what it’s going to take to get me there.   While sitting in the hot tub on Saturday night I got the outline started.  The thing is, this is a big year

for me.  A few different things are going to happen and it’s either going to take the book in one direction, or a different one.  I wished on a star for the first

time in a million years. I can’t tell you what the wish was, but it was book related.

I also made another big decision.  I’ll let you know how that one turns out next month. :)

Hope you all had a great weekend!  CLICK HERE to read up on the continuing saga of transitioning from running shoes to barefoot trail runners.

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20
Jan
Ladybug Bellagio
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Ladybug Bellagio, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I’m gearing up for my weekend. By gearing up I mean; drinking absurd amount of coffee, watching HGTV, and finally learning how to use the Photoshop

program Lester got me for Christmas.

I’ve never used photoshop. I was given Photo Impact a million years ago by my dad and I wasn’t the one who mastered the use of it. I could change a few

colors, but I figured if you can’t get the shot you want without the use of photoshop for basic touch up, you suck.
My friend, Tammy has shown me a bunch of really neat things you can do with the program and I have been wanting to give them a shot, but with 5,000 other

things to do I just put it on the back burner.

Yesterday I went into the Garmin online program and I set my routes and goals. I am so excited to finally get a chance to use this thing as it was meant to be

used…and then it started raining. NO, I am not complaining because I am giddy with excitement because I know that my trails are going to be all soggy and

squishy! That is my favorite part of being a trail runner is that moment when you’re in the deep cut and you have to watch every single step you take. That’s

usually when Tabitha starts singing the Indiana Jones theme.
I thought that this weekend was my one year, but it’s really the weekend in January and I am going to be out of town. Who knows, maybe I can find a trail out

there and get all muddy. Lester asked, “What if it’s raining?” when I mentioned getting out on the trails this weekend. “Then we get wet.”

Run a 5k in 2012 is going well. I haven’t checked, but I think I actually bypassed my goal for 2012, but I don’t want to count yet. I’m just enjoying everyone

sharing their stories with me and each other.
My transition to barefoot running is going so slow it’s almost painful. Since the last time I pushed it, I have been taking it even slower. I want to bust out on a

trail and see what I can do with them, but I don’t want to hurt myself.
Last weekend I took them out for a quick 5 miles. Lester’s son said after watching me do some rock climbing without slipping at all, “I wish they had them in

my size.” I had to laugh because his dad hates the look of them.
Tabitha’s is doing better with her calf. She can now put some pressure on it and isn’t hobbling like she was earlier in the week. I was so worried this was

going to take her out of the game for awhile, but she’s been taking it slow too and I think it’s almost time that we get back into the gym and start training for

the summer.

I’m doing good. I have been having weird days and I have to remind myself that it’s okay to be weak every now and again. It’s just this uncertainty in my life.

There is only one person that can fix it and that’s me, so I am going to take the steps to get more stable.
Well, there are about 3 more cups of coffee with my name on it and If it kicks in and stays kicked in I can find my yoga pants for the class I am about to sign

up for! Yep…you hear that right…YOGA.

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19
Mar
I tawt a toad.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Or I caught a cold.

Either way, I have decided that there are things to keep myself entertained while I am unable to breathe.

1. Clean house with strong cleaners. I can’t smell them so they can’t kill me.
2. Keep telling the kids, “…because I’m your bob…Bob…BOB…MOB!…i gave birf to you!..yes MOB, that’s what I said the first time!”
3. Get on Voxer and leave everyone sexy messages.

No more Dayquil for me.

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16
Mar
What a week!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


2, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Today is Jeremiah’s 6th birthday and I got him his Phineas and Ferb dolls. Earlier this month I got him Perry. I also picked him up some Perry PJ’s, his Big

Bang Theory poster with Sheldon on it and some popcorn. He was thrilled. :)

I spent most of the day lounging at Lester’s place and doing some light cleaning in preparation for my 40th birthday party we are having here next weekend.

I’m so excited for this that I can’t sit still.

It rained like hell today and it’s so sad that all I could think is, “oh yeah, my trails are going to be nice and squishy for the runnin’!”
Lester got a pair of Vibrams this week, but I’m thinking he won’t be to thrilled to get his first run in with mud all the way up to his knees so I may have to pull

this one off alone. I could of course fanangle Tabitha into it because she was calling me an asshole for not being home today so we could get in a super rainy

run in.

Now it’s a beautiful rainy Friday night and I am getting ready to write my first actual article for a website that is interested in some of the skydiving and Vibram

I have. I’m hoping it works out well enough that I can then get the guts up to ask Barefoot Ted for an interview! I was thrilled he accepted my Facebook request

and even more thrilled when he emailed me back.
Can I be a barefoot trail ultra runner? Yes, I can. Barefoot Ted said I could!
I am doing my first barefoot trail race in May and then doing another one the week after that.  I would say I will need to get another pair of Vibrams … but I

already did. Thank you REI dividends!

:)

Have a great weekend everyone!

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13
Mar
easy, light, smooth and fast.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Untitled, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
“Try the meditation of the trail, just walk along looking at the trail at your feet and don’t look about and just fall into a trance as the ground zips by,” Kerouac

wrote. “Trails are like that: you’re floating along in a Shakespearean Arden paradise and expect to see nymphs and fluteboys, then suddenly you’re struggling

in a hot broiling sun of hell in dust and nettles and poison oak… just like life.”
― Christopher McDougall

“I have to write about this book!” was the first thing I thought of when I awoke this morning. I had spent 8 hours reading it from cover to cover.
I have been back on my reading spree since Alyx put The Hunger Games trilogy in my hands at the beginning of this month. I can’t just casually read a book.

I pick up a book and I start to read and I don’t put it down. It’s frustrating to those around me. “What’s for dinner?” ….”Whatever you can find.”

Late last afternoon I picked up “Born to Run” by Christopher McDougall. I had been flipping around the ultra runner blogs and the barefoot runner blogs and

in each they had quoted or mentioned in some way, this MUST READ book. I wasn’t even sure what the book was truly about because Ultra running is one

thing, Barefoot was another. Right?
The full title didn’t give me any more information other than it was about a tribe of superathletes and the greatest race the world never seen. Vague.
Regardless, I bought the book to just to be able to say, ‘yes I read it’ when people would come up to me and ask me after seeing me wearing my Vibrams if I

had read the book. Now I see how stupid that is because I started wearing the shoes before I read the book and it’s not why I was wearing them. My first

introduction to barefoot running came from running behind Tabitha for miles and miles and watching her leg muscles get super defined. I figured she was

some sort of mutant woman who could morph into whatever she was doing and that is why she took to running so well and why her legs were rocking hot.

Then Dan got a pair of them and after miles and miles of running behind him I noticed the same definition of muscle that hadn’t been there before.
I also noticed that I was a good 5 minutes behind Dan on the uphill when before I could take him all the way to the top. No, I couldn’t catch Tabitha…but that

woman is a mutant superhuman running machine and when you put Vibrams on her feet she floated up hills.
After watching the both of him do the uphill work on Steven’s trail and look like they were out for a walk in the park, while I was rolling around in the parking

lot like a dog’s chew toy after a good thrashing, I decided I was going get a pair for myself and see if truly did make a difference.
It made a difference and now I am one of those people that want so badly to preach the joy of barefoot running, but I’m doing all that I can to shut up and just

say, “Yes, they are very comfortable. No it doesn’t bother me that I have things between my toes and no I don’t feel every single rock I step on.” Because I

don’t want to be the person that says, “I can’t believe you wear those feet coffins!”
I’m not there yet because of my true love of my Brooks Cascadias.

The Brooks Cascadias brings me back to this book.
I wasn’t really sure what I was getting into in the first 5 or so chapters of the book. Was this book about the crazy guy? Was it about the writer looking for

complex answer to his simple question? Was it about the Tarahumara people and their ability to not only run fast, run for long distances AND be smiling and

laughing while doing it? Was the book about the shoes they wore, or better yet, the LACK of shoes they wore? Was it about the start up how the ultrarunning

began and how it evolved? The pioneers in the sport? Nike? The Olympics? The Big Bang Theory? ….what the fuck was this book about and when was I going

to finally ‘get into it’.
It crept up on me. I was actually ‘into it’ long before I noticed I was into it. I couldn’t put it down to save my life. Then it started talking about the Western

States 100. I actually swelled with pride when the author mentioned Gordy. How could he not? The bad ass that pioneered this shit in our own backyard. I have

read every single account of Gordy’s 1974’s little jaunt in the woods that I can find online. I have actually seen him running on the trails and each time I look

back at him and I am certain what I am seeing isn’t real. How could it be real? How could the man that ran the first Western States run be running on the same

trails as I am at that same day? Impossible. I have been running and I told Tabitha and Dan, “I swear that was Gordy.” And each time they will respond with,

“Who?”
I found him on Facebook. There…ON FACEBOOK. I had the option to “add as friend”? not just like, but ADD AS FRIEND? Are you shitting me?! I’ve never

added anyone on Facebook. I feel like it’s a bit presumptuous and I feel awkward about it so I have never added anyone until my mouse hovered over ‘add a

friend’ next to Gordy’s name. I must have sat there for a good 5 minutes debating on if I should click the damn button. ‘He won’t accept me. He doesn’t know

who I am. He has NO idea how inspired I am by his story of crazy oddball people that saw what he did and said, ‘yep, I wanna try that too.’ And low and behold

we have a new sport. I didn’t even go searching for the first guy that thought, “hey I think I will jump out of a plane…’ when I started skydiving, but bet your

ass I learned all about the history of skydiving because if I am going to do something, be it jump out of a plane or attempt to run 100 miles, I’m going to know

how it got started and why.
So I clicked ‘add as a friend’. Heart hammering in my chest, I laughed. “I just requested Gordon Ainsleigh as a friend on Facebook…that’s funny.” And about

4 days later, he accepted that friend request. Floored doesn’t cover it. Then about a month later he commented on my facebook wall.
I’ve seen Alyx in the past year do this crazy obsessed teenage thing whenever anything about Taylor Swift or Hunger Games presents itself. I became Alyx that

day. “NO FUCKING WAY!!!” No one of course understood the excited girly squeals of delight and breathless recounting of the story of how he commented

because Gordy isn’t walking the red carpet or playing televised sports. Nope, he’s just that one guy that ran 100 miles with some horses and started this thing

that I have grown to love…even though I have never once made it into the place of ultra running. I am like a child in awe of a adult that is able to walk around

so effortlessly while I teeter and fall over after 10 minutes of holding myself up next to the coffee table.

Oh yeah, I was talking about the book. They mentioned Gordy and I felt such pride for my trails that he calls his home and started thinking about how many

seasons he has seen on those trails, the changes he has watched through the 40 plus years of running he has been on them. I have 1 year under my belt. How

weak.
Then they started talking about other runners running the WS100 and I felt pride for those people too.
The writer gave me a relationship with each of these people that I felt I understood each one on a personal level. Barefoot Ted, yeah…I get his ranting and

raving about shoes. I understood the free spirit of Jenn and Billy, they were born to do this…that was what they were destined to do. I got Scott during the

point of exhaustion when he had nothing left and there was no way he could keep going, but he did…and won…and set a record. I don’t get that part…YET. I

do get the part where you pick yourself up from the side of a trail and just keep going because you have no other choice. That hasn’t just been my experience

with being on these trails, but in life. Why keep making lemonade? Because life enjoys seeing me squeeze the fuck out of these damn lemons, THAT’S WHY.
This book wasn’t about the WS100, but some of the runners in the book knew the pain of the WS100 , so it kind of was. It wasn’t about barefoot running, but it

kind of was. It wasn’t about the Tarahumara tribe…well, yes it was, but it was so much more.
It was about a group of people that had one thing in common and it was a special kind of spirit.

Tabitha had suggested I watch, “The Way”. I did and I understood why she liked it so much. It embodied everything we had learned last year about how you

can connect with a person on a different level by just walking with them. You have time to hear stories. You understand why they pack their Camelbak the way

they do. You see the type of person they are when you’re walking, hiking, running, jogging and just soldiering up a hill. Me, I pack everything in my

camelback. I want to be prepared to nurse someone back from the edge of death if need be. Tabitha is a whimsical woodland fairy whose pack has the

essentials to make sure that her time is fun and practical. Bug spray, lip balm and a bag of trail mix. Dan’s isn’t so much what is in his bag, but the efficiency

of which he has packed it. I’ve brought others on trail runs and it’s interesting to see what they bring. Each person has a story to tell just by what they bring or

don’t bring and how they manage to get it packed in.

The times I have had out on the trail with each person is a different story of strength, vulnerability and growth.
It has shown me that the core of who I am will always be the same. I am a survivor if I like it or not. The odds of me just lying down to accept what the world

has offered up are pretty nil. As much as I joke that I will be the first to go when the zombie apocalypse comes, I realize that I won’t. I will be the one helping

people to safety and nursing them back so they can fight another day.

Last night I had a dream about this race I am doing with a bunch of friends and I guess the book I managed to digest in 8 hours had a part in it. I was in the

middle of this race and I got competitive. I’m not a competitive person at all. You want the gold? Okay, here I will help you get it. Oh, I have the gold and you

want it? Here, you can have it. In this dream though, I was clawing to the top of this hill with a friend of mine and I was doing all that I could to get past him to

the finish line. It wasn’t first place we were fighting for, it was to not be last. Somewhere above us we heard his wife yelling down at us two to knock that shit

off and have fun. Then we did. We both fell backwards back into this mud pit we had been trying to claw out of and laughed. Then it started to get fun and we

forgot about the fact that somewhere along the race I had burned half my hair off and he had a swarm of dead and splattered bees in his shirt and shorts. In

my dream I was laughing with my friends.

Tthat’s why I loved this book so much. I could get out of my head for a few minutes and read about the love of doing what I do and how it started. It started

because I was letting gravity pull me along these trails that I had walked before and knew what the end of the trail brought me, another beautiful trail…and if I

moved just a little bit faster I could get there and see it before the day was over. If I kept going I might just find one more magical place.
If I just went a little bit further….

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06
Mar
40th….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


DSC_8667, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
We are nearing the actual birthday day and I’m happy, but kind of sad because I miss Kara.

For the last 19 years I have given up my birthday so Kara could have a good one. My ex friend Nancy threw me a wonderful 30th birthday party where my

family showed up, I was surrounded by friends and it was stress free and fun. The last couple of years I had thought of all the things I would do for my 40th

birthday and as it got near I realized all I wanted was to have my friends and family near me.
Now as it gets even closer I realize I would give up my birthday if I could just have Kara here surrounded by her friends and family.

It’s a huge hole without Kara here and Christmas was nice, but she was missed. It’s getting to the point where it’s hard to talk about her with the girls because

they miss her so much and we have no idea when she’s coming back, if she ever will. I was sad for so long when she moved and then I realized that hurt

wasn’t going to go away until she came back so I decided to not hurt anymore, but in the process I feel like I have lost her.

I know things change and people go away. My life has been a huge example of just that. The only thing that I have to hold on to is that I know that happens

and no matter what you do or how hard you try to hold on…it might happen regardless so just enjoy the time you have.

I’ve learned to not base your whole world around another person, be it your child or spouse…because when your child grows up and leaves,…what are you

left with? A life you have to figure out how to navigate through that isn’t based on what they are doing or when do you pick them up after their drama class?

*sigh* I miss my daughter, though.

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02
Mar
Welcome to my birthday month!!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Yes, I am that obnoxious about March. March is the best month of all the other months. If you’re born in March, good for you…if you’re an Aries, you’re even

better than all the other March babies.  If you happen to be born on March 23rd or 24th your level of awesome is off the charts and I bow to you.

It’s the first Friday of The Birthday Month (which will now be known as TBM) and during TBM every Friday will be celebrated.  Oh wait, that’s every day.
The first day of TBM was spent having dinner with the other wives of the The Hockey Wives Club.   We claim it’s a book club, but we talked about the book

(Hunger Games) for a total of 3 minutes and that was explaining the charms on the bracelet that Alyx let me borrow for the meeting.  It was nice getting out and

hanging out with other women that are married to men that play on ice.
I came back to my place to a very smiley hockey player who had feasted on the dinner I had in the oven for him.   I think that was the best part of my

Thursday!

I am doing my Anywhere 5k tomorrow.  I am so excited that I don’t have to deal with crowds!!
In the process of looking for that race I found a few totally obscure races in the area that I am thinking about doing.  I want Shea to have a few races under her

belt going into high school.  She already has one, but she hasn’t done one since last year.

Well, i’m off…been up since six getting clothes washed, bag packed, kitchen cleaned, gps charged and camera cleaned off.

:)
Have a great month everyone!!

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01
Mar
It’s the best month of the whole year!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Lester, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Is it my weekend yet?

I am ready to go play!

Hike? run? bike? go somewhere beautiful and take pictures and spend time with my man?

All of the above?

It’s my birthday month…ANYTHING is possible!

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27
Feb
All by myself!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
http://barefoottrailrunning.blogspot.com/2012/02/kristine-1-k2-1-54-miles-total.html

I did my first hike in the canyons BY. MYSELF!  It was a bit freaky, but I did pretty good.  No snakes, no bears and no mountain lions.  Did run into an ultra

runner prepping for the Way to Cool run.  Badassmotherfucker he was.  He was probably in his late 60′s.

Saturday I did a near 3 mile bike ride with Lester and his boy. Hello quad muscles.

Tonight I went to Lester’s hockey game where I got just a wee bit pissed off at a player on the ice and then proceeded to follow him to the locker rooms where

I called him a douche.  The only thing I had going for me is that he was on the other team and I was a girl.  He didn’t look too thrilled and looking back, it was

a bit stupid for me to do it. I could have started a full on fight between the two teams had the guy been able to pick his jaw up off the floor after I yelled down

the hall at him, “YES YOU! YOU ARE A DOUCHE!”
Really? I probably looked like trash saying it, but I was so pissed! He had slammed Lester to the ground twice and checked him into the wall once and then

spent 20 full seconds whacking away at this guy on the ground and then turned around and did it again.  Ashley said it’s called, ‘high sticking’ or something

like that. I called it, being a fucking douche.
I will never do that again, let myself get that worked up over something stupid.
Like we all know, It takes A LOT to get me pissed. It takes even more for me to say I am pissed and it takes the earth to tilt on its axis for me to get pissed off

enough to say something.  Poor guy, he has no idea what a douche he is and how much douchery it took for me to call him on it.

I’m usually the person yelling, “good block!” to the other team when they deflect our puck.

Not tonight.

I even cheered when one of our guys grabbed a guy by the helmet and brought him to the ground.

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo unlike me.

Pretty sweet weekend if you ask me.

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22
Feb
guilty….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I had to laugh when I watched this… SHIT BAREFOOT RUNNERS SAY .  I am guilty of like…15 of these, if not more.

No, I haven’t read Born to Run…yet.

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18
Feb
and you’ll get back to the car…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


and you’ll get back to the car…, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I have never been more grateful than the moment when I asked him, “okay…where next?” and he said, “back to the truck.”

My goal is to be able to be out for hours doing this…just not so many hills so soon.

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17
Feb
because we can…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


because we can…, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Well, let’s add one more thing to things I have never done before.

Mountain Biking.

Unless of course you consider BMX racing in the mountains (not the same to me)…a million years ago.

I uploaded the Olmstead to my Garmin for this weekends ride. (because this is the damn trail we got lost on and ended up hiking 25 and half miles)

And this is the part where he sees the full extent of the amount whining that can come from this woman.

It’s only a ten mile ride. I should be fine. …. right?

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22
Apr
typical trip to redding. *rolling eyes*
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random

Sometimes when I fill up my gas tank I get adventurous.  I calculate how far I could go and where I would end up.
This happened on Friday.
On Thursday I stayed the night at Lester’s house because I didn’t have the girls and figured I would lounge on his couch and watch glorious television all day

long and not think about the laundry that was piling up at my place because I am never there.
I woke up Friday morning and I needed to go somewhere.
The whole day was right there for me to take on.  This happened on Thursday morning as well, but that ended up with me packing up my running gear and

heading up to Cool…which was cool. Yes, I know, that’s probably been used a million times before. suck it.

I ran home and got more clothes, none of which were normal clothes because I apparently I only wear clothes that can be worn during a hike, bike or run.  

Because I usually only go riding with Lester, I tossed my biking pants aside and opted for my favorite running shorts and a tank top and shoved it in my

already packed bag from last weekend’s bye-bye trip.

After the tank was full, I decided I would drive to Redding and see my sister and scare the shit out of my mom.

All the way to Redding I blared my music as loud as my poor car would allow and sang at the top of my lungs.  I thought about all the fun things we could do

when I got there.  None of which included riding a bike for 12 and half miles without my biking shorts, but I digress.
My mom called me as I was pulling on to her street.  She was sweet as she recapped the last conversation she had with someone else and asked me what I

was doing.  I wish I would have said something more on the lines of ‘deer hunting’ or ‘trying to find Jimmy Hoffa’, but in retrospect, she would have totally

believed me if I did.  Instead I said, “Ohhhh, nothing” as I walked up behind her setting off her two dog personal security team.  Dasha and Mooshu went

apeshit when they saw me and Mom came about 2 feet out of her recliner.
So much better than what I had envisioned in my mind.

My mom kept insisting that we call my sister. I kept telling her that wasn’t necessary that she could just be surprised when she got home, but mom was like a

teenager that was afraid she was getting caught smuggling her boyfriend in while she baby sat and kept calling until Kathy picked up.

“why are youuuuuuu heeeerrrreee???” she asked. “something wrong with your hair? you and Lester get in fight?”
I realize I should probably come visit my family more often if they think the only time I visit is when my hair has reached root length long enough to pass as a

cast member of Jersey Shore or I am in a verbal altercation with Lester.
“Because I love you and I wanted to hang out with you.”
She’s not buying it and eyes my hair for signs of a fucked up haircut and my eyes to see if I have been crying.
“No reallyyyyyy! I wanted to just hang out with you. I have to go home tomorrow though.”

This is when rapid fire planning comes into play.  ”Okay, we could do this….” and she names off 30 things we could do in a short amount of time.
We settle on Dutch Brothers coffee on the way to get Chinese food from the airport and then a bike ride before I leave in the morning.  I got a six pack of beer

and we went back to the house where I finished one and half and decided to call it a night.  Yes, my party days are SO over.

The next morning she came in, looking excited and that’s when I remember I had agreed to a bike ride on the river trail.  I put on my clothes and cursed at

myself for not packing my biking shorts.   Can’t be so bad, i’m going to ride mom’s cruiser and it has a nice big seat!  How cute will I look on it too!?!
This happened to be the weekend of Kool April Nites in Redding and the place where we normally would park was now overrun by classic cars and people

taking pictures in front of them to use as their Facebook default pictures, WHICH I am not buying because I know you drive a Pinto!
We parked at the mall and rode down to the real start of the trail.  This downhill wasn’t super steep, but it was enough to let me know that the brakes on my

mother’s bike NEED TO BE REPLACED.  I kept reaching for my handbrake and it wasn’t there and I would cry a little bit.
My sister told me, “When you pass people, you need to say, “ON YOUR LEFT” real loud because they will get scared if you don’t.”
I’m sure that would have worked, but so did, “HOLY FUCK THIS THING HAS NO BRAKES, GET OUT MY WAY!”
I even apologized to people as I flew past them with wild eyes, “SORRY, NO BRAKES! THIS ISN’T MY BIKE! IT’S MY MOM’S BIKE!”  Which I am sure I have

been been added to the contestants for “Daughter of the Year” for allowing my aging mother to ride a bike that has no brakes.

At the bottom of the hill my sister finally stopped and I would like to think she saw the, “I hate you and your stupid ideas!” look on my face.  She offered to

switch me bikes which I didn’t even try to pretend wasn’t the best idea she had come up with all weekend.

I got on and tested the brakes and they worked.  That is all that mattered, until about 3 or 4 miles in when I realize that my ass has swallowed her bike seat.  I

mean, not all the way because the two bones that made sure my children didn’t just fall out when I was pregnant were screaming, “YOU CAN NOT PUT THE

CHILDREN BACK IN! YOU MUST KEEP THEM!”
I truly felt as if I was being violated by my sister’s bike seat.  I would stand up a bit and try to get my lady bits and lower body bones to stop aching, but as

soon as I sat back down, there is was…a bike seat righhhhht up there.
When I caught up to my sister she was all smiles and showing me how if you stand up and bounce on the brakes you can get them to work.  The image of my

my mother trying that tactic got my mind off my coochie.
“Kath…my pelvis bone hasn’t taken a beating like this since November of 2009. I need to take a break.”

The way back was a lot less painful, except that hill back up.  I decided that I wasn’t going to push the bike AT ALL up that hill and I didn’t.  I kept chanting, ‘if

a 50 year old woman on a cruiser with no brakes can do it, I can too!”    All I could think of when I was riding it was, “I could run the fuck out of this hill…why

do I keep riding a bike when I can run faster than I can ride a bike?” and then I remember I am the slowest runner in the world and the aching in my crotch

will eventually go away.

I went to the gas station before leaving and got some water and trail mix for the ride home and that’s when I was reminded of where I grew up.
A woman in line in front of me was eyeballing my Merrell Mud Run shirt and ironically giving me the stink eye for wearing my “work out clothes” for a trip

into the big city while she was wearing a pair of Saucy velour pants (I’m guessing that Saucy is the knock off of Juicy) and a T-shirt that had, what I would

guess was her favorite monster truck airbrushed on the front.  I figured we were equals and just said, “Hi.”  She pursed her lips and reached into her purse to

pull out her clear Ziplock bag of money out of her purse.  I had just been dismissed by a woman that still wore hair scrunchies, 1980′s Reboks and kept her

money in a baggie.
This is when her crack pipe fell out of her purse and shattered on on the floor at her feet.  I was still wearing my Asics from the bike ride and hadn’t switched

over to Vibrams that I normally wear and a good thing because I would have had crack pipe all up in my toes if I did!
She looked down in shock and I would think that the thought that was going through her head was, “Karma…that is what I get for being such a rude ass bitch

to the woman wearing all work out gear behind me in line and being a tad bit too judgmental.  Perhaps she had just rode 12 and half miles with a bike seat

shoved up her ass.  Maybe she was buying water because she was dehydrated and the trail mix because she can’t handle the candy crash she has 20 minutes

after eating it.  Maybe she wasn’t trying to look like she was better than me and I am just a little too cracked out to notice that I am wearing my husband’s

monster truck shirt that is covered with what I hope is Cap’n Crunch Berries and not cat litter.”
This, sadly probably wasn’t what she was thinking.  What she was probably thinking was, “FUCK, I JUST SHATTERED MY CRACK PIPE.  Poppy is going be

pissed when I get home. Maybe I can hoof it over to the Beadman and pick up a new one. SHIT, no money, just spent it on this pack of smokes and a Diet

Coke.”
She bends down and picks up what I am guessing is salvageable bits of crack from the floor and then tells the sales clerk to not cut himself on it when he

cleans it up….and then WALKS THE FUCK RIGHT OUT…head held high.

I learned a lot this weekend.  1. Pack your cycling shorts no matter where you end up. 2. You don’t need a full set of teeth or shoes from this decade to pull of

superiority.  3. Only virgins will get to see Unicorns. (I am still a little pissed about this, but the next time I am in the middle of an all night sex exploration trip

I will shout out, “SO WORTH NOT SEEING UNICORNS!”

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13
Apr
Packing for the weekend…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I am getting my clothes ready for this weekend and all of it is running or biking clothes.

Saturday we are going biking. Sunday I am leading a group of people on a trail run.

I’m eager to be able to start packing some rock climbing clothes! :)

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12
Apr
sick of rain already!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


it rained last night., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Day two of rain and i’m totally over it.

I’ve taken showers with less pressure than this! The drops are big enough to cause bruising.

I can hear Lester saying, “mmmm, rain makes mud.” and I wonder what bicycling adventure he’s going to bring me on and how muddy I will be at the end of

it.
I then see my trails and my feet start twitching to get out there and sink in to the squishy running goodness!

Stop raining please. I have a 1000 feet in 1 mile hill to take on at least 4 times before this month is over!

It’s still raining.

I hate driving in this shit too.

STOP WITH THE DAMN RAIN!

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10
Apr
Alyx is next up!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


DSC_0346, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Kara took her Dad’s camera when she moved to Virginia and left her D50 that has been acting strangely for about a year or more. I took it in and had someone

look at it and got it working again.
Now Alyx is using her camera and I am limited on my lenses so I let her use the kit, which I don’t usually do because it’s actually rather expensive. She was

playing with it all weekend long and when I got home I popped out the card and looked at what she had created. Holy shit, she has been paying attention!

I guess it’s time to actually teach her how to use this beast and what what everything means. ISO, Shutter, Aperture.

She has the eye, now to flood her with the information that she will need.

:)

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08
Apr
wow.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
converting from raw to jpg really takes away from the quality of the pictures…and then when you upload it to flickr, it just rapes it.

…wow.

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05
Apr
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I was watching HGTV awhile ago and they had this woman who had a box of pictures of what she wanted when it came to the design of her home.  Ideas she

had seen in the years leading up to the day when she would be able to create her home. The designers were annoyed and didn’t go with a single idea of hers,

but her annoying box got me thinking about her vision for her future.
As of late, I am for the first time making plans for my future.  I am the kind of person that lives each day and what happens, happens. I will go where the wind

takes me.  WELL, that has been great up until now.  Now I need to figure out how the second half of my life is going to play out.

I want my own space to call my own. I have 40 years worth of memories, things I have bought, things that I see that make me smile and things that have made

up my homes that my children have lived and been loved in.  It’s weird to think of sharing a space with someone again, it’s terrifying to think of moving into

someone else’s space and them not into mine.   The complexity of pulling this off seem almost impossible and I know that is the pessimist in me, but it

seems easier to just give up on the idea instead of having to create the way it could happen.  Mentally stepping away from my own space is hard enough, but

not being strong enough to express what I want in this new space makes my heart stop a little bit and scares me.  That fear, that fear of being able to say, ‘this

is what I want and I can’t compromise this one thing’ might be the thing that causes me to just politely say, “it’s okay. i’ll figure something else out.”
That isn’t what I want though. I want to wake up with the man I love every single day. I want to have my own space in this new world that I can have my girls

laughing and being obnoxious and seeing me happy and relaxed.

I want a fresh start…with twinkly lights.

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05
Apr
I lived through it.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I’m still processing everything, but was able to write a little bit on my Trail Running blog.

It’s just the day before and after the run, right now that’s all I am ready to share. Right now it’s something just for me.
Lester went with me and I can’t even believe how incredible he was.  Two people I admire SO much, one running in front of me telling me amazing stories and

one running behind me as moral support.

After the run sitting in the truck I sat shocked, winded, in awe…”That was awesome.”   I don’t think there will ever, ever, ever come a day when I can describe

something as “awesome” and mean it more than I do about today.

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03
Apr
OH. MY. GOD.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
just breathe.
just breathe.
just breathe.

Of all the things I have done in my life that are crazy insane and scary as hell, tomorrow is going to top all of them.

When my life is over and people are talking at my funeral they will talk about tomorrow as the turning point in my life, when my life changed in the most

monumental way…when I was rewarded for something good I did in this life.

I’ve had gone through labor 3 times, lived through 2 wedding days, jumped out of airplanes by myself, allowed myself fall in love when I didn’t think I would

ever fall in love again…and this is like 1000x scarier than all those things together.

All day I have been thinking about the lead up to tomorrow.  I’m going to do something that about a million people would kill to do and I am going to go out

and look like the freaking retard I am, but I am going to do it for all of those people that would love this opportunity.

I’ll write more about it tomorrow…if I live through it.

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29
Mar
YAY!! I’m FINALLY 40 !!!!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Breakfast Day 4 of eating right., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
What an amazing birthday I had!

On Friday, Lester picked up Sammy from the airport and Matthew made his way to Sacramento after work.
Tabitha, Matt and I went to the Almond Tree and I might have had a few or 7 drinks and danced to Morris Day. OhweOhweOh!

The next morning I got up to Matt looking very serious (and hungover), “I’m not hiking with you.”
To read the whole story: http://barefoottrailrunning.blogspot.com/2012/03/happy-birthday-trail-run.html

I was greeted at the house by Mara, Lester and Sam. I was sad to hear that Mara could only stay a little while, but I was so happy to have her there. She looked

fantastic! I love that everyone is getting healthy!

We had a house full of people and it was such a relaxed day. The weatherman had been promising rain for a whole week, but the day came and only a couple

drops fell out of the sky. We alternated being outside to hanging out in the house. Lester even spent some time showing off his shop and garage while I hung

out with my friends in the living room.
He did take me aside to show me my birthday present and I was blown away. There are no words for how happy I was! I had mentioned something that I

wanted for myself awhile ago and he had heard me. It was actually mentioned in passing through a Facebook question I had asked my friends when asking

people if they could have their very own space, what would they do with it.

After my weekend I decided it was time to get on track for improving my health. On Monday I went out and bought all the stuff that I knew I would need to kick

start it.
I decided to make the Iskiate. This is best described as a gelatinous goo. There is something a little bit wrong about how this looks after an hour of letting the

seeds sit in the water. It’s a snot like consistency and it has seeds in it. This is what I was going to drink? OH HELL NO.
I went to the fridge and poured myself a nice glass of Coke Zero.
Then I stirred the iskiate again and looked back at the Coke. FINE. If I can put the crap that is in a Coke in my body, I can at least take a sip of this jelly like

seed drink.
I’m not going to lie, I actually sat there and had to talk myself into it. The second I took a sip, I regretted it. There was no way I could swallow this down…but I

did. I decided that the lemon juice wasn’t going to cut it and I added the Crystal Light peach tea mix to it. I’m not sure if it’s possible, but it actually got

thicker. I put some ice in there and mixed it up again and just decided to gulp it down. No need, it wasn’t so bad.
YES, it takes some time to get use to drinking slimy seeds, but it got easier and I’m on day 3 and every time I make it, I have to laugh. WHO AM I ?? I’m hell

bent on getting healthy and that includes eating eggs…something I absolutely hate.

I’ve signed up for 3 runs this year. They are all trail runs and I am so happy to see that they are really opening up a bunch more for us that don’t street run

and don’t do the utra running…yet. Lester is running two of the three runs and I might just talk him into the third. I’m just happy to have him joining me. The

last run is the Merrell Mud Run that I did last year, but this year I am going to do it barefoot. Tabitha is running for time and I am still just about the start and

finish…and the beer afterward.

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22
Mar
Happy bithday to me!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Happy bithday to me!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
:) Yay!

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07
May
My trails are good listeners
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


My trails are good listeners, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I found this video on my trail runner page. It’s only been a year, but I have learned all these lessons in a quick time. It’s a good reminder, especially after a

rough weekend of running and a rough couple of weekends coming up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6MmAu2ILE6g&feature=youtu.be

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06
May
Build Anyway…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


she’s mighty mighty, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Things don’t always work out the way you want them to.
No matter what you do to build and hope that everything is strong enough to weather the storm…you just don’t know what little thing is going to bring it

crashing down.

Today, I don’t feel like rebuilding. Today I feel like I just want to stand back and look at the rubble and be sad for it. Tomorrow I will move forward.

Tomorrow. Not today.

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04
May
CONGRATS!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Kara has interviewed for 3 jobs in her life and has gotten all 3 jobs!  Congrats Bear Bear!

Got any pointers for dear ol’ Ma? ;)

I love you!!

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03
May
decoder ring set to stun.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I get these cryptic emails from Tabitha ever so often.  I pull out my Secret Decoder ring and try to figure out what she’s saying.  Today I get one with finishing

times for a race.  I am pretty sure she’s saying, “step up the game, we need to do it in an hour.” because yesterday we ran the course and our time wasn’t

pretty, but not bad for our second training run of the year so far.
I have looked at this race before and it’s kind of like the one I am running this month, but it’s put on by a company I don’t know anything about and I want to

volunteer for a race before I run it to see if I like the company that is holding it.  I learned this lesson on New Years.
Anyway, I pull up the map.  PLEASE, can SOMEBODY please put together an updated Western States map? That one is tired and it’s not entirely correct.  The

map makes it looks like there isn’t  a chance of getting lost.  Bullshit.  Oh yeah, sorry…So I pull up the map and laugh at it because we have ran this ‘half

marathon’ before, TWICE.

I read the cute description: “ Half marathoners will run on the historic Western States trail, out to no-hands bridge and will then tackle one of the toughest

climbs in the area, and training grounds for top runners, the dreaded K2. The latter portion of the half marathon will join up with the 10K and 5K runners and

will traverse through meadows, single track, and farmland rolling hills, making your way back to the start/finish”

So yes, Tabitha if you’re asking if we can run this half marathon next year…YES we can.  If you’re saying our time sucks…Yep, I know. We are working on it.

If you’re saying ‘they are keeping me chained to my desk and feeding me nothing but gummy bears…”   I got nothing.

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02
May
Ooooh-Weee!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


IMAG0079, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Had a good long chat with Gordon last night. Decided today was a new day and I needed to just keep it going and push further and go harder.

“Everything will fall into place when you get there. Enough talk of being strong, go be strong!”

Today, I was strong.

Tomorrow I will hurt like hell.

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01
May
Lies we wish we could…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
On Monday Tabitha and I went for our one of three runs to train and I was lagging because I was recovering from being sick from Sunday.  The only thing I

gave her was being able to take on the hills like a beast.

As we neared our destination of 7-11 we slowed down and went in and picked on our favorite cashier.

When we started walking home we went over the run, she made me laugh so hard when she looked down at my Garmin and said, “We need to get that bitch to

lie!”

So true. My Garmin doesn’t lie.  We need to pick up the game a bit.

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01
May
Best quote of the weekend
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Dad had to lock the doors so I grabbed the three .45 guns and the bag of ammo and took it out to the car.  Lester had the back door to the 4runner open so I

decided instead of waiting for dad to load his truck we could just put what I had in our truck.
I hand Lester the first gun, he looks at. I hand the bag of ammo. I hand him the second gun.
“Why are we loading guns into the truck that are loaded and hammer pulled back?” he asked.

and for the first time I got to say that stupid line that people say and it makes no sense, but in this case, it TOTALLY did.

“Because that’s how my daddy roles.”

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30
Apr
…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


loving my new toy!!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Time to pack up my toys and go home for awhile.

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26
Apr
the rain makes it easier.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random






I saw this the other day and it reminded me of this card I saw about six or seven years ago at a little shop in Old Town Sacramento.  I remember looking at the

drawings on the pictures and what she had written.  When I got home I googled the company and found she had so many more.  I swore I was going to order

the book she had written, but I never did.

This just makes sense to me.
I’m strong because I don’t really have any other options.
Being weak reminds me of this woman I once thought I knew who after getting to know I realize was just a waste of space on this planet.  Even as bad as my

life could get, at least I wasn’t her. She over compensated for  her for  taking of breathing space by talking about how this person or that person in her life was

“the best in their field” as if that made up for her downfalls, at least all of her “friends” were high class lawyers. I never wanted to be that weak as she was,

living each day dependent on manipulating other people to survive just one more day.  Life was to be lived, enjoyed, ran through with reckless abandon.

Okay, so this might not have been the best approach in life, the whole…reckless abandon.  In reality, I never really had THAT option as well.  I was a step

mom at 18 years of age, married at 20, had my daughter at 21 with two others close behind.  Between taking kids to school and passing out Children’s Tylenol

to them when they were sick…I never had time to plan ‘reckless abandon’.  Then I was single and in college, remarried again, divorced again.  I just didn’t

have time to dream of what life could be like. I would wait until the kids got older and then figure out what my dreams would be.

Just for the record for some of you, it doesn’t get easier as they get older and the dreams and places you said you wanted to see, go unchecked.
I never thought I would be lucky enough to take a boat in the middle of the ocean in Maui and fall over back off the side and scuba dive again, but I was and I

am so grateful.   There are a few things in this life I never thought would happen, but I made them happen and things I didn’t even know I wanted, I am

blessed with.

Right now, at this very moment I am having to be grateful for that saying, “What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.”.  I don’t want to be grateful though.

I’m tired of being strong. I’m tired of being worried about the little details.
I’m 40 years old and for a month, a week or just a whole day I don’t want to worry about what tomorrow brings.  I want to say, “I don’t have to think about

that…i’m going to be fine.”

…i’m the only one that can make it ‘fine’ though.





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24
Apr
i shit you not!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
So Tabitha are sitting on my patio having a beer and talking about the topic of the day…how dreams sometimes do come true.
Then it derailed so fast my head started to spin with, “HOW? WHAT. THE. FUCK?”
How the conversation took such a strange detour, I might need to retrace my our conversation:

Talking about Billy, perfect weather, “a fuckin’ tree!”, Lester, a rake wine rack, “if it’s not one thing, it’s my mother”, billybillybilly, some more billy,

Oakland’s Day on the Green, pink bunny rabbits playing the drums to Tom Sawyer, pregnant Pantera concert, OH THERE IT IS!  I got it.
So Tabitha and I are on the patio drinking a beer and I was sharing a story about the concerts I had been to and I remembered this one Moby concert I went to

in San Francisco and how afterward we were walking back to the hotel and passed a strip joint.  I had informed my date that I had never been to a strip joint

and he said he had been in the famous OFarrell Brother’s theater, but it was simply for the historical value.  Yeah, historical value…let’s go with that.
So I tell her proudly how we went in, as if I am giving her some insight on how truly cool I am.  Then she tells me about the time her and our ex-husband had

gone to the city and went into a strip club. I then realized, I think we paid too much to for a lap dance, because they got a show.
“There was this woman.” She leans in, “she uh…could smoke a cigarette with her…” she looks down “crotch.”
“WHAT THE FUCK!?” I look at my cigarette and try to put all the pieces of my shattered mind back together, “WHAT. THE? You’re fucking shitting me.”
She started cracking up, “I swear, her cootchie was smoking a cigarette.”
My mouth fell open again at the image and then the questions started, “How? how do you even know that your…I mean, was she sitting around one day and

thought, ‘hey, cool party trick.’  or ‘i need a gimmick and I shall be the woman who can smoke a cigarette with my pussy.’  YOU HAVE GOT TO BE SHITTING

ME!”
She shook her head laughing. “I swear.”
How could someone make this up?
I kept going through my head all the questions I had to ask, “could it exhale?”  She laughed even harder, now remembering more clearly, “YES!”
“NO!!! IT DID NOT! Did it blow smoke rings too?”  At this point we have reached full busting up and shocked laughter, “yup! I KNOW, I asked all the same

questions too!!”

“I’m blogging this and you can’t tell me no!”

We exchanged funny quips and then she remembered, “Oh god, she could also do this thing…where she shoved birthday candles in her nipples and lit them

on fire.”

“SHUT UP!”  there is just no way.

She giggled as she tried to explain how that little party trick worked.

“It’s like this shit is just writing itself!”  I tell her.

“It was kind of cute.” She tells me, “Her boobs were dressed up as little cupcakes.”

… just when I think I had heard it all.

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23
May
I hear voices…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Untitled, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
It blows my mind when I check my Facebook and have a comment from someone I admire SO much.
It scares the shit out of me when I get a message from him because truly I don’t know what I am going to get. Is he going to grill me on running 5 miles every

other day? Will he be giving me a pointer on my next race? Will he have another pearl of relationship wisdom? I never know.

Yesterday I posted the fact that I was thrilled that I got 42 out of 44 on my second 10k. I mentioned I wasn’t the last in my age group either. When I saw he

posted something, I set my phone down and let my stomach settle before I read it. What I was expecting was, “that’s not enough..you need to push…go be

strong..”
Instead he compared our struggle of our runs. AS IF my measly 10k (his warm up) is anything to compare to his hundreds, but he told me in a message

before that fast is relative and we all run our own race. It brought me to tears again. He reminded me at the end what it really was…a nice run in the sun.
I was so grateful that he keeps me grounded and in his unique way motivates me to be a better person in our running world. He pushes me when I think I am

not worthy of this blessing.
Sometimes I get lost in my head out there and I always hear what he told me on our run together when I am out there.
That conversation is mine and I thought of sharing that time so I wouldn’t forget it and so others can learn from it. There is SO little in this big world that is all

mine, and that time is something I will cherish. My friend Amanda, Tabitha and Lester (who was there with me) are the only ones that I want to share it with.

The one thing I am going to be selfish about. :)

It still just blows my mind.

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22
May
what 6 years will do for a smile.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Best Before and After picture of ALL time!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I went to Folsom Powerhouse building last weekend and I had been there before and remembered that those steps made for a great shot with amazing

lighting.

When I got home I found the original picture and was shocked when I saw the difference. Not the physical difference, but in my eyes. You can truly see how

unhappy I was. I didn’t realize it at the time. I think I had convinced myself that I was happy or this was about as good as it was going to get. I remember I

laughed a lot back then, but overall…not happy. I was just content and remembering thinking, ‘if this is as good as it gets, I should just be as happy. This is

the bed I made.’

That day I remember we did some walking and if I remember correctly I got winded coming back up from the river. This trip out I was only out there so I could

get Dan back to running. We had to stay in town because he was on call so I picked Folsom since it had a river we could run along. Honestly, I thought it was

going to be like riding a bike. He would get out there and outrun me. Instead he was struggling and generally pulling a Kristine with the excuses department.

When I told him where our destination part was and was running in front of him he was struggling to breath. He can usually run past the point in the distance

for us to run to, but this time he actually stopped before the point while I kept going.

The 2006 picture seems like just yesterday sometimes. That hurt and damaged woman was struggling so hard to keep it together and come up with a plan to

survive. I thank her for the ability to be able to know that no matter what happens I will have the will to survive, but I want to bitch slap her for staying in a

place she wasn’t happy for so long.
No, I want to do more than bitch slap her, I want to kick the living shit out of her!

Things I learned from 2009 Kristine:
1. it’s not okay to just be content with someone. You need to love someone so much it makes your pee pee tingle every time you think about that person.
2. it’s not okay for ‘date night’ to be photographing someone wedding.
3. grabbing of the boob and saying, ‘miss you’ isn’t foreplay and it certainly doesn’t make up for the lack of intimacy throughout the rest of the day, week or

month.
4. being unhappy because you think it’s for the greater good for children not to have to go through a hard time is fucking stupid. I will NEVER allow my kids

to see me somewhere I am not happy.
5. don’t sign your house over to anyone. ever. for any reason.

Things I wish the 2012 Kristine could have told the 2009 Kristine.
1. Go hiking.
2. Stop saying, “I only run if I am being chased.” it’s not witty, it’s not funny and you probably wouldn’t have ran even if you were being chased down by a

guy with a sharp knife.
3. Read between the lines when Tabitha is talking. She is trying to tell you, “yeah, you dumb bitch…if only you knew.”
4. Remember Dec. 31 2003 ? You will keep finding that shit for the next 5 years…you swore if it happened again you would walk. You didn’t walk. Dumb bitch,

next time WALK if you are being disrespected.
5. Travel more, floss, stop secretly crying in the shower, you can’t save him, stop trading in your happiness, your kids will love you even if you fail, your will

hurt will go away and you’ll find happiness only you can create…back up your hard drive of pictures.

It’s weird revisiting a place in your head and heart and vividly remembering the sick to my stomach pain and misery, but not even really even remembering

the person that caused so much of it. I think that came from forgiving him and myself for letting it define who I was, for allowing depression from being

unhappy control me.

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person, or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we

seek.” -Obama

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18
May
10k … TAKE TWO!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


hill work, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Tabitha and I have our 10k tomorrow morning at 8am.
She jacked her foot and my ankle is still all messed up.
She said she was a little worried, but I told her…”It’s just another trail run.”

I was reading the description of the course and even though I have done this trail a few times last year, I can’t remember it so much, I know the uphill is a

bitch on a broom, but it can’t be as bad as K2 or Knickerbocker.
The view is always worth it. Hills and meadows for as far as the eye can see.
Please God though…NO MOSQUITOS!

RunA5k2012 is doing so great! I got a HUGE donation for our running group and I couldn’t be more pleased.
Zombie Runners donated a nice package and Road ID went above and beyond with a great donation of their road IDs and an email that seriously made me cry

because they had read the FB wall and the website and they are impressed with how far we have come in such a short amount of time!

Hope everyone has a great weekend.

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17
May
Purple because aliens don’t wear hats.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Purple because aliens don’t wear hats., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Robert Downey Jr. is one of my favorite people. I think because he’s weird.
I watched an interview with him on Screen Actor’s Guild and his wife was interviewed briefly and was asked what she thought of him, “I thought he was weird.”

she answered.
“When did you stop thinking that he was weird?”
“Oh, I still think that he’s weird.” and to that he blew her a kiss and flipped her off. It was beautiful.
He talked about his time on Ally McBeal, one of my favorite shows and his description of why it worked with him and the show and her character was,

“Because I was willing to give as much as I needed in return.”

I loved that line.

I’m willing to bend until I am sure I will break, but know that even if I do break I can mend. In return I must be given the same respect.
In the past, I didn’t give that much and I never asked for it either. Two failed marriages and I have never been more proud of things I failed at than those two

things. I became a better woman, mother, wife, friend and I was able to learn what I would need to navigate through this life.

Grace and an unbreakable will to survive.
…and Otter Pops. Lots of Otter Pops.

My desire to finish the rest of my life off as authentically as possible feels almost impossible at times. The desire to find joy isn’t though and maybe that is

what I will focus on.

Otter pops and my own joy.

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16
May
Congrats RA5k2012 !!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Brooks Running Dig Deep Laces, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

I am so excited to announce that the hard work I have put into Run a 5k in 2012 is finally paying off.
It’s May and I have almost already reached my goal.
Brooks Running donated DIG DEEP shoelaces and I put together a Giveaway for our group on Facebook and then began reaching out to other companies

around the US.
We now have 4 other companies willing to help us out with products for future giveaways!

Please join Run A 5k in 2012 and help our group grow and motivate others!

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12
May
Strawberry Pancakes and a big ol’ hug!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I did it!
I woke up this morning with minor ankle pain.  We got up to Cool to start our run and I had taped up my ankle and was thinking about how my calf on the

other leg might get blown again for trying to baby the ankle on the other foot.

The run started and my boyfriend and I were together for about a half mile before I got stuck on the single track behind some walkers. There was no getting

around them, so I just hung back and listened to them complain on how hot, dusty and muddy this run was.  HELLO, it was TRAIL RUN!
I got a chance to get around them and tried to catch up with Lester, but he was over the hill already.

Further in on the trail I came across a group of people who were training for a half marathon and thought this would be a good ‘warm up’ for them.  I’ve never

heard more complaining.  ”This terrain is so weird, I can’t run. It’s like it couldn’t make up it’s mind if it wants to be uphill or downhill. Was that a snake?”  At

one point I had to giggle.  The one woman heard me and she giggled back, “I’m complaining a lot huh?”  I told her, “it’s usually me that is doing the

complaining, but since this is all I do…I don’t know any better.”  Then for the next half mile I heard all about the joys of street running and how it’s usually

flat with just minor ups and downs.  It was about then we opened up to the most beautiful meadow.  ”But do you get to see THIS?”   I wanted to spin around

and spout out the joys of trail running, but if you couldn’t see it while you were running through it, there was no use in trying.
“Yeah. It is.” She agreed and then her and her friend were left behind as I listened to them try to figure out how to maneuver through a big mud patch.
Up ahead was my ‘pacer’. She was appointed the job when I noticed her slow stride.  ”HI!” I said as I caught up with her.  She had to be sixty something and

she was past running and just power walking up a hill.  We got to talking and she told me she had fell down one of the hills that I have run many times.  She

has busted something in her hip and was still recovering.   As we neared the creek, she plowed through it like a trooper and I let the icy water cool my feet as I

helped some runners that were trying to make their way across the slippery rocks before they took on Knickerbocker climb.

During the middle of the climb I met another woman. I said, “Jezzus. I have to quit smoking!” and she, straight faced said, “I have to quit smoking crack!”

She asked me if I had done this before and I told her that yes, I had and it was almost over, I mean…after you get up this bitch, around the corner and up the

last bit.  She groaned and tried to catch up with her friend.

Finally I was alone and could find my stride. The sun was about 5 miles from the earth and my arms felt like I had stuck them to the tail pipe of a motorcycle.

The aid station was up ahead and I drowned myself in two cups of water and started down a hill into another meadow.  At one point a giant butterfly came and

tagged me in the head.  ”WELL HELLO MISTER BUTTERFLY!” I yelled out and thanked him for reminding me why I was so happy to running.

My watch told me that it had lost GPS satelites and I didn’t even care, I knew the end was near and that meant I could finally go pee.

Cresting the hill I could see Lester’s bright yellow shirt at the finish line and I was all smiles as I rounded the corner, high fived the volunteer and crossed

over into his waiting arms where he gave me a huge hug and kiss!
Best Finish so far!
He was there for me during the Resolution Run, but when I crossed the finish line the only thing I could think of was finding a first aid station for my blown

calf.
This time, I said, “I FELT GREAT! NO PAIN AT ALL!! That was SO MUCH FUN!”  I could still feel him breathing hard so I know he wasn’t too far ahead of me

and I was was so proud of him I almost cried.
We found a fellow runner and got our picture taken at the finish line.  I am all smiles because it was the perfect run for me!

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11
May
arrrrggggg!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


IMAG0121, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
On Monday night going into the kitchen, I BARELY twisted my ankle on the kitchen rug. I had a shooting pain go from my outer ankle and up my leg.
Many times on the trail I am running and I lose my balance and my ankle gets all worbly and hurts like hell, but I keep running through it and it’s fine. I’ve

even hyper extended my knee on two different running occasions and been alright after resting for a second. I would be fine. The next morning I was standing

in the kitchen telling Tabitha how my ankle was sore from walking into the kitchen. I turned to get something and that exact pain came shooting again. “SON

OF A !”
“Ice it.”
So I did. All day on Monday I iced the hell out of it. I would have to be fine before Saturday because I had my trail 10k coming up. I iced every day and each

day it didn’t get better, it got worse. Yesterday I hit the point of frustration because it was up to every 20 steps I took, I got that shooting pain.
Now it’s Friday and my race is tomorrow and I am sick to my stomach thinking that I won’t make it through.
I decided that I don’t care how much pain I am in. I am going to start it and finish it. I might be dead last, but I need to prove to myself that I am stronger than

I am. I’ve already proven I am more stubborn and more stupid than I thought I was.

I told Lester he has to run his own race. Get his time. When it comes to time and placement I am not as competitive as I should be. I’m just always the person

out there just happy to be able to run and be a part of something bigger than myself. I thought Tabitha was going to kill me when I gave up 10 to 15 minutes

of my time in one race to help this guy over one of the obstacles. In my first run I was the person stopping to help people take pictures next to the mile

markers. I really don’t care if I’m last, but that I can look back on that race and say, “OMG, that was so fun!”
This race I actually TRAINED for though. I took the trail in sections and ran it during the week and on the weekends. I did the whole trail to see how well I

could do it and how much water I would need. This was going to the race I could be proud of my time.

If I get there and there is absolutely NO WAY I can do it, I will be cheering people on…NOOOO, I don’t want to not do this. That trail is SO MUCH FUN! It has

these massive hills and a beautiful creek and meadows with butterflies the size of your head!

I’m going to go cry…and then ice some more.

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10
May
Definition of “Oh shit”
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
A photographer from a well know national magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park. The magazine wanted to show some of the

heroic work of the fire fighters as they battled the blaze.
When the photographer arrived, he realized that the smoke was so thick that it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything

from ground level. He requested permission to rent a plane and take photos from the air. His request was approved and arrangements were made. He was told

to report to a nearby airport where a plane would be waiting for him.
He arrived at the airport and saw a plane warming up near the gate. He jumped in with his bag and shouted, “Let’s go!”
The pilot swung the little plane into the wind, and within minutes they were in the air.
The photographer said, “Fly over the park and make two or three low passes so I can take some pictures.”
“Why?” asked the pilot.
“Because I am a photographer,” he responded, “and photographers take photographs.”
The pilot was silent for a moment; finally he stammered, “You mean you’re not the flight instructor?”

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09
May
Darlin’ for so long…you and me been findin’ each other for so long…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Just found a bunch of videos going all the way back to Christmas.
Alyx has been taking video for Kara since she left and she uploads it so Kara will feel like she’s still here and not missing anything.

There is every moment of us opening presents this year, the trip to Shingletown with Paw-Paw, Alyx getting her ears  pierced, and then about 10 videos of us

on our road trip to Redding to see my sister.   I think every hour of that ride was documented.
I look like hell in the video and there isn’t a single moment in these videos I would keep for any reason what so ever.  My hand hovered above the delete

button and then I thought about it.
Someday I won’t be around anymore and they will scramble for any video or picture of me from a certain time in their lives so they could remember.
If they were to watch this video after I am dead, it will be like going on a weird 3 hour road trip with me…and they will be happy to have it…unless of course I

die in a horrible firey car crash, then of course it will be painful to see me in a car when I could actually drive.
Maybe I should just delete those videos.

Naw, she has a video of me singing The Bee Gees.  That is SOLID GOLD right there.

Wanna See?


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08
May
The way I see it…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
I went to go see 5 Year Engagement with Jason Segal and the way I see it, he owes me that money back.

In 2003, My boyfriend at the time and I went to watch Ben Affleck in Daredevil and it was so bad that my boyfriend broke up with me.  Well, that’s not exactly

why we broke up, but it was the clincher.   For a long time I blamed that movie and had I thought it would work, I would demand he give me my money and

shattered ego back.   Then him and Jennifer Garner got together because they were in that lame movie together so I forgave Ben and chalked it up to fate and

if my 8 bucks means that he has a lifetime of happiness then it was worth it.

So here it is. I forgave Jason for The Muppet Movie because even though he pounded us on Twitter about going to see it, I have always been a fan of The

Muppets and you can’t really get too mad at someone for a lame movie that involves hand puppets. That one was on me. I fell for it hook, line and sinker.
This movie though was HORRIBLE.  I felt like I was having to actually sit there through the whole 5 years.  I may never forgive him.

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11
Jun
Stupid Excited!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Steven’s Trail, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I got my email from the race director for Western States 100 mile endurance run. I will be at the Foresthill aid station. I am so excited I could puke.
In my running group I have a runner who is also going to be at the same aid station. We have never met and that will be our first time. What a great way to

meet someone!

This is mile 62 out of 100 and last year Killian got in to that station in 9 hours.
Lester and I were driving home from Monterey when he made it to Foresthill. I had planned on going out last year to watch the runners come in at No Hands,

but it was too late. They were MUCH faster than I had expected.

This year, I get to be there as a volunteer and I couldn’t be more excited.

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10
Jun
She gets me.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


She gets me., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
How much do I love my daughter? So much!

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09
Jun
Last weekend’s hike
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random

My Facebook Caption: Taking the family to Iowa Hill
Lester and I decided to take the brats to Iowa Hill for a hike. We had decided we would do a little hike where I could show Ben these really cool mining caves

that the locals were sweet enough to guide us to the last time I was there.

We put together some lunch and headed out. The road up there is a puke inducing one lane road and I guess I forgot to remind Lester of that before we

embarked on our trip.  I’m not sure how many trips we will make up there because the road wasn’t one he would probably like to drive too often.  The other

side of this trail is the opposite of this on every level.  The other side is full sun, well traveled and manicured. The road to get there is short with not a single

curve.  The opposite reasons are reasons why this is my favorite trail.  Getting there is scary and nauseating, the trail is dark and scary at places with no one

usually out there but the wild animals and our doggie tour guide.  It’s more technical because of the lack of weeding and cutting back.  The poison oak is a

little out of control, but I didn’t mind it at all…I mean, except for the part where it came up to the back of my knees!


We started out battling getting through the blackberry bushes and looking for the cave that I knew was out there.  Within a few minutes it was clear that we

would need to already reapply the bug spray we put on at the car 15 minutes ago.
I had mentioned that this was a “bug spray” trail, but until you’re out there do you realize that you almost need 100% deet to keep the bugs at bay.
The caves were easier than I thought to find and Ben seemed to really get a kick out of the first one. The second one was a little harder to get to. On the way

down I took point and noticed a snake on a stump. It was a small black and yellow one (garter snake). Alyx has the same fear I had of snakes before I finally let

Lester’s daughter get me over it with her Ball Python snake a couple of years ago.   She stopped dead in her tracks and was ready to turn around and head

home.



the mouth of a mine



 The trip to the river was 3.7 miles and everyone held up pretty good.  The girls bitched and complained the whole time, but that was something I was

expecting. We haven’t been on a single hike or trail run that they smile, laugh and sing, ‘we love mom because she makes us go out in the woods and hike

and run with her’.
Ben was having a great time and I got a kick out of watching him explore all the cool things that I think make the trail magical.  The butterflies looped up and

around his head and he would point them out and tell me something educational about that certain butterfly.  I would stop and point out the beautiful wild

flowers that line certain parts of the trail.


About half way down the trail is my favorite part of the trail. It’s usually where I drop my pack and just look at the beauty of where I have ended up.  The water

falls through the moss lined rocks. It’s so quiet with just the sound of the water.  The perfect reminder of why I love doing what I do.

I knew we still had about two and a half miles to go and I asked if everyone was okay to keep going and Ben and I took the lead when no one said, ‘nope.’  

The girls always want to turn around and head back, but I promised a spectacular lunch and guilted them by telling them that I really wanted this day with

them to be a good one.   Alyx was still recovering from the snake situation, so I had to take that into consideration.

It wasn’t until the part where we could hear the river that Ben began to ask how long before we made it to the water. Looking at my watch, I said “15 minutes”

and if we weren’t walking at the snails pace, we would have made it in that time.



Ben loved the “rock climbing part”, but Lester was on edge about him climbing up. “Dad! I can do it!”
He really felt like he was doing something special as he grabbed the rope and I held out my hand to him while Lester spotted him from behind.  The smile on

his face when he came up was worth every moment of complaining I would have to hear coming back up this beast of a trail.
When we started back on the trail he was telling me about how he likes to rock climb and had done it at the Merrell Mud Run last year.

We made it to the river and started our lunch.  I wanted to put my feet in the river and managed to slip in. I was going to go swimming regardless, but it was a

stupid rookie move for me to slip in.




Lester showing Ben a snake swimming in the water

On the way back up I was preparing for the volume of complaining from everyone.  We had a good pace going though. Lester and Ben actually pushed

forward ahead of us a ways. The girls didn’t complain, and Shea even took the heavy backpack.  We would stop and take a few breaks, but the mosquitoes

were so bad we had to keep moving.  Alyx was looking like me a couple of weeks ago where panic was about to set in.  Her and Shea did some running up the

hill and I hung back (as always) and just took my time looking out at the canyon, spotting dogwood trees and just thinking about my life and the people in it.

At the top of the hill I caught up with Ben and was able to do the last half mile with him. I was expecting him to be tired and whiny. Nope, he was chatty and we

talked about a bunch of stuff.  His little chat with me was my favorite part of the trip.
It was a big weekend for him and I didn’t want him to think I took it lightly. “You did almost a 10 mile bike ride, the farthest you’ve gone on a bike so far! You

learned how to not only swim with your face in the water, but learned how to swim underwater AND touch the bottom of the pool! AND TODAY! look at you

doing a 7 and half mile hike, the furthest you’ve gone so far!”  He recapped each event by telling me about each thing he did and what he liked.  He admitted

that he was a little bit tired and I told him I was too. He said, “Yeah, but you do 10k runs with my dad!” and the amazement in his voice when I pointed out that

he had just gone FURTHER than a 10k almost brought me to tears. “Whaaaattt?” I explained him the difference between metric and miles and he couldn’t wait

to write that on his hiking rock.







When we got back to the top and to the store, we sat down and had a well earned soda. I showed Ben the teepees in the back and the pictures from when that

town was in full operation.

Lester and I knew the kids would pass out on the way back home, but we had no idea how cute it would be.



Lester’s Facebook Caption: “Bringing the family home from Iowa Hill


It was a good family hike.

*copied from Unlikely Runners

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07
Jun
Way to go Bay!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


IMAG0408, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Honor Roll award. Manufacturing Technology medal and Distinguished Reader award.

I am SO proud of her!

When they called the award for honor roll for the whole 8th grade year I was shocked. In 7th grade she had a rough time. She pulled it together in her 8th

though!

The ManTech teacher came up and I knew she had to get something because the class required only 3 things and I think she doubled that because she had so

much fun creating things with her hands and working with the machines.

Distinguished Reader…LOL! Thank you Hunger Games series! She asked me, “you think they will have a quiz for The Bloggess book?” Uh, NO. Didn’t stop

her from reading the whole thing.

Today was a great day for her. I’m so impressed with the accomplishments all of my girls have gotten in the past few years. They are stronger than I could

have hoped for!

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06
Jun
Shea Leih…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Taken by Shea, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
She’s graduating from 8th grade.

Let’s just take a moment and look at this little flash back in time:

https://www.facebook.com/notes/kristine-seguin/first-days-of-school-through-front-yard-snapshots/435486388072

So odd. I’ll post more pictures tomorrow.
Thanks everyone for following me on this journey!

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02
Jun
Sexy…no matter how you look at it!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Sexy…no matter how you look at it!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Spent the morning mixing up the three things I do best.

Dirty trails, Vibrams and Photography.

I would have had said four things I do best, but Lester wasn’t there. ;)

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31
May
Not a single shit will be given on the day I wear my shark eating my leg socks.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Not a single shit will be given on the day I wear my shark eating my leg socks., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Kara’s coming home in July for the whole month and it will be nice to be able to just breath again knowing she’s with me and safe.
I know the second we have our time when it’s just us she’s going to make me spill my guts and tell her every single thing I am feeling, thinking and going

through and I will cry for about a straight hour as she talks to me as if she has all the answers in the world. She will sort out all the stuff I keep shoved down

and I can’t talk to anyone else about. Not that I don’t want to, but everyone is caught up in their own things and honestly I am tired of hearing myself say the

same damn thing anyway. But Kara…she’ll just see it and drag it out of me. Maybe then I can sort it all out. GAWD, I need my daughter home NOW.

I want to do so much with her while she’s here, but I have to share her with her sisters, her dad & friends.

There will be a night where we just lay in bed and watch a bunch of Disney movies, The Goofy movie 1 and 2. We can even watch The Jerk (her favorite) and

Pee Wee Herman’s Big Adventure. yes, I am feeling that generous!!

So ready for it to be July, done with June and it hasn’t even started.

My goal for the whole month of June, to not give a flying a fuck about anyone giving a shit what I am thinking, feeling, expecting.

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29
May
ENOUGH!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Everywhere…that stupid video from Lodi of the old lady coming out of her harness.

The ONLY person that has actually did any sort of real reporting on it was the Today show because they interviewed the woman.

It makes me nuts to hear people talk about skydiving that have NO CLUE and they act like they know the whole situation that lead to the woman coming loose.
the ONE thing that is driving me nuts is this;  It’s a DROGUE! it wasn’t the ‘mini parachute’ or even better, ‘the ‘chute’.
One reporter stated while watching the video, “And you can see right here that the ‘Chuter (i’m guessing he meant, the TANDEM INSTRUCTOR) knew

something was amiss and he decided to pull the mini parachute”
That isn’t a ‘mini parachute’. it’s a drogue.

I could go on and on about the stupid, stupid, STUPID reporting, but i’m not going to.  It just makes me look at all the other reporting on shit that I don’t do

and wouldn’t know if all of what they are saying is total bullshit.

No, watching the video wouldn’t get me to not skydive again, nor would it get me to convince people to not skydive.

I mean come on…we have MINI PARACHUTES that will save our lives. *rolling eyes*

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28
May
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Bob and Maralyn Visit, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Peanut is the toughest dog to get a picture of when he has his ball. He’s full of energy and wanting anyone to throw it for him.
I managed to capture this picture after he had backyard full of people that would throw it for him and he was just a little tuckered out.

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25
May
Beautiful Date Night Run
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


I decided last minute that Date Night would be a training trail run. As always I invite the Usual Suspects and no on could make it.
Lester said he was down to run with me and I decided that since the next “trail run” (It’s not really a ‘trail run’ because it’s more a gravel road run and no

technical difficulties involved) is the Merrell Mud Run in October we could get a head start on this training.  Last year it was the first time I did that run.  It was

a compromise between the Tough Mudder that Dan wanted to do and the Warrior Dash that Tabitha wanted to do.  This was close to home and didn’t involved

being screamed at by Marines and electrocuted by live wires.  It took me an hour and 18 minutes to finish this run and I don’t regret a single minute it took. I

got to help out fellow runners which wasn’t something I was seeing enough of from their “team mates”.  This year I want to complete it in less than hour and I

will be happy.  Who am I kidding? I will be happy to be able to be out there, smiling, running with my friends and helping anyone out that needs a hand up

and a kind word.

We started out at the Jr. High School and I was testing out my new hydration pack.  I’ve gone through a bunch of them trying to find the right one and no

matter what I get there is always some sort of flaw in it that makes me kick myself in the ass for buying it.  Stop buying the cheap ones and suck it up and get

one that I see all the ultra runners wearing is what I finally did.
I got the Nathan Hydration Vest and I have ZERO complaints.  If at some point I get off my lazy ass and start working out my arms I won’t have to worry about

the rubbing of my arm on one of the pouches on the front.  Other than that, HEAVEN.





The view on this run is beautiful. It was windy outside and the waves lapping on the beach reminded me of Maui and made me want to close my eyes and

pretend I was running on the beach.  The ground was sandy and it was tough getting any kind of traction though.   Coming up and around this corner I

actually stopped and took a picture so I could remember this moment.
When I got around it the trail had a few curves and it felt good to actually have to think while I was running.  Looking up the hill I saw Lester up there already

waiting.  Ass can run up the hills without getting winded.
I didn’t stop and just power walked it.

We made it to “heartbreak hill” and it wasn’t as big as I remember it being. It still hurt like hell and I stopped half way up and decided that if I am ever going

to get anywhere in this damn sport, I better just put away my smokes and try to do this right.

Getting to the top I didn’t feel as bad as I did at the run last year so that was encouraging, but I am going to have to do this a few more times to get over the

head pounding I get when I try to take on the hill.
I saw some women running up with all the ease in the world. Non smokers with hours of training. Yep, I need to get there.

We headed back and it was mostly downhill.  The uphills were rolling and I took those without a problem.   Lester said that wasn’t a Vibram trail, that was a

Brooks trail and looking back, I have to agree. The next time I run it I am going to try doing it in my Brooks.  I know I won’t wear them during the race though.

I packed my shoes just in case we decide to try it out again. :)

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03
Jul
Busy…so busy.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Our drive home, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Having Hurricane Kara home for the month is awesome, but I am following behind her and picking stuff up she keeps leaving out.
I never realized it before. She’s the 19 year old version of me…that doesn’t pick shit up after she’s done. At least I get around to picking it up, she doesn’t.
She’s also obsessed with make up too. I should be more interested in it because she’s so excited to share her finds with me, but since I wear so little of it and

I have expensive stuff that I buy and then use for a couple of years (yes, A COUPLE OF YEARS!! …and I don’t clean my brushes either…did you just faint?) I

realize somewhere there is an expiration date, but I could care less. For 40 bucks for eye shadow, it better last me 4 years. Mascara is about the only thing I

don’t mess with.

Marina finally got her tattoo. It says, “Let Go” which is what my tattoo says. I picked it because of where I put it, on my ankle. It’s the last thing that leaves the

plane and I heard a skydiving quote that said “in order to fly you must let go of the things weighing you down”
Mine is inside of my tattoo and you have to know where it is to see it and know you’re looking for it. I was happy when Lester squeezed it in there when he

drew it out to “kinda” match his ;)

Alyx has been a driving fool lately. I left my car with Dan so he could put in my new stereo (yes, finally upgraded from my cassette player) and he let Alyx back

it out of the driveway that is sloped. She said she stalled it twice. I’m still impressed. The first time I drove a stick I stalled it about 30 times and that was on a

flat surface. There is no way I could teach my girls how to drive. I would rather shoot myself in the face. Freaking out would be at an all time high.

I’m doing some part time work now. It’s really nothing, but I am having a lot of fun…A LOT of fun. The people are great to work with and they treat me really

well.

It’s been a good start to the month. Hope it keeps going this way.

Oh, and I get one more pin on my wall of the “I just ran my 2nd 10k this morning, just kidding I am on my 4th donut” I am going to kill myself. It’s nice that

people put all the cute running inspirational stuff on there, but I have had the same ones about 10 times now. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings but…GAH.

My goal before the year is up…get Jim to run with me. I have already converted Birdie, she said she would never run and is now on her 4th of 8 5k runs she

has signed up for. ANIMAL.

:)
Getting excited for August as well. Did I say ‘excited’? I think I did! :)

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27
Jun
I have three girls now!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Untitled, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Picked up Kara at the airport at 10pm on Monday. I have been SO good about not hogging her. She stayed the first night with me and I did so good to not cry,

but when I woke up to her beautiful face cuddling with her “binkie” (she couldn’t say ‘blanket’ when she was little) and I remembered picking out that binkie,

putting her crib together and kept asking my growing belly to please just hurry up so we could get to know each other….I burst into tears.

Dan let her take the truck so she has been going here and there and everywhere. I don’t mind so much. I know my time with her is limited and once she gets

all her hanging out with everyone out of the way I will get to talk to her…just us.

I’m happy that things are falling into place in my life and she doesn’t have to see the stressed out me (even though I am) or the totally despondent me. She’s

got an exhausted me, but at least she’s not trying to pick up the peaces of her shattered mom.

We sat and talked a little and she’s happy for the changes in my life that are coming. I think. I hope. She’s scared of course because she remembers the

disaster I was left with before and even though I held it together as gracefully as I could, she was the one that heard me crying out of complete fear of what

was going to happen to the kids, the house, the van, our lives and not just once, but every single day for months until I finally just said, ‘fuck it, take the car,

the house, take every thing…my kids are more important than anything you could destroy in my life and now that they are back, you can’t hurt me anymore’.
She saw the strength and I she learned from it…even though it scares me that she saw me so broken. Maybe she needed to see it though to see how far I have

come and will continue to go.

We talked about marriage today. She’s so smart. I have no worries about how her life will turn out. She’s not a dumb-ass like her mom.

Oh, and for those of you that are keeping track of how old you are by reading this blog: Alyx is getting her permit to drive next week.
Yes, you are really THAT old.

:)

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25
Jun
Just one aid station worker’s story from WS100
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Western States 100 Mile Endurance Run 2012, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Six months ago I signed up to volunteer at The Western States 100 mile endurance run.

When I started seeing WS100 hats worn by people on the trail I decided I needed to google what it meant. I read this story about this guy and his horse and it

all just seemed so unreal. Then a few years later a guy that wears a giant hat with horns on it who is famously known as Cowman A Mooha finished with

Gordon. Who makes up this shit? I kept reading and was shocked to find how many people actually ran 100 miles in 24 hours. At this point I was struggling

with a single mile in an hour and these people did 100 of them in a whole day? The thing is, I didn’t think it was insane. I gave up saying that when I took up

skydiving. I thought those people were batshit crazy, until I realized that they are probably some of the safety conscious people you would ever meet.
This just seemed…unreal. I read everything I could get my hands on and I studied the map as if I was being tested on it. My excitement was explosive when I

realized that the last 40 miles of that trail was what I had been hiking and running on in the past few months. I watched video after video and studied the faces

of the people during the race. I wept at the website I found that had Gordon Ainsleigh’s actual story he wrote about the race. There must be something truly

wrong with me, if I was even considering this. Then one day I said it out loud. “I want to do that someday.”

Back in April I had emailed Gordon about a question and to thank him for HIS story. He offered to take me running. I have never been more grateful to know

those trails and have ran them before I went out with him. He can see into someone, he saw something in me…enough to tell me and continue to encourage

me through the months. He saw something more in Lester, enough to remind me this weekend.
That day though, I am still not ready to share.

Last year I had been watching, signing up for updates, refreshing Twitter and checking the podcast as Lester and I drove to Monterey. I was certain we would

have enough time to make it back to Sacramento before the first runner crossed the line. We weren’t even close as Killian crossed over in 15 hours.
“NEXT YEAR I WILL BE THERE!” I said when I closed my laptop for the night.

My confirmation email finally came in and I was stationed at Foresthill. I didn’t care what they had me doing. I was going to be there and that’s all that

mattered. Lester agreed to go with me and help out if needed. A few days before the race I drove the girls up to Reno to hand them off to Paw Paw for a week

of camping and as we passed Auburn, Alyx looked over as the canyons opened up, “Those your trails out there?” I got a lump in my throat and I just nodded

yes. My 15 year old daughter call those, ‘my trails’ and for her to see that they are such a huge part of my life made me so proud.
Lester and I started the drive up and I kept thinking about that drive to Reno when I was telling Alyx about WS100 (not that she doesn’t know the story by heart

by now) and I asked her if she wanted to know where it started. She knows where the ending is because one night after a hard run I said I wanted to see the

finish line so her and I ran the track at the high school until we finally saw the sign they have up there. We finally got to the Squaw Valley exit and I was so

emotional at that point that all I could do was poke her and say, “here. It starts here.”
“HERE? WHAT? Okay Mom, this 100 mile thing isn’t sounding like a good plan.” It’s a good thing that I was wearing large, dark glasses because behind them

I was crying. “Sounds like a hell of a plan.” Is what I choked out and spent the next 10 miles questioning why I was so emotional about an exit on a freeway I

have passed a million times before, even taken a bunch of times. That’s when I knew. The old me passed that exit on the way to Reno to sit in a casino and

gamble for the weekend. That old me didn’t know about a life so magical with rewards and blessings I sometimes don’t even understand how I got so lucky to

have. That old me would look out the window and count the miles until she could plant herself in front of a slot machine, smoke and drink and laugh with her

friend. How selfish of me to not appreciate the beauty that was surrounding me and not think for a single second outside of that world I was in.
This person I am now, I see trails EVERY WHERE and my body aches to explore them all. Now it’s the not the destination, it’s the journey to get me there…

and it will not be in a room where they pump oxygen in filled with bright lights and loud ringing. Now it’s fresh air, the sound of my feet, the feel of the wind

screaming through the trees. The things I get to see out there, unless you do this…you do not get to see. That explained the other reason I was crying…I knew

that right up the road about 10 miles was 400 people who got to see what I do and they understood it. I was a part of something bigger than any casino could

ever give me.

We pulled into Foresthill and the crowd was already there. We signed in and got our T-shirt and were asked how we wanted our station to work since it was a

new thing and they had no idea how it was going to work. Lester took over quickly and earned the name “Shuttle Captain” His smile when he told him new

title made me so proud. Here’s the guy that just agreed to help me out a week ago and had NO IDEA what he was getting himself into. He took care of

everything before we left from the food to the chairs and making sure we could find the place. He was smiles all day and helpful to every single person he

came in contact with…and I am guessing he probably spoke to roughly 2,000 people. That might be an all time Lester record…the fact that he did it while

genuinely smiling shows how much he loves me. Not a lot of people, who don’t really like people all that much, would agree to do what he did.

I’m not exactly sure what I was expecting, but Lonnie, our aid station captain showed me around and told me how things were going to go, I felt a lot more

relaxed and ready.
Later we all gathered around and had our team meeting. Lonnie went back over things, even though he knew that all his team members were prepared. He

then said, “Most important is the runners. You treat them like gold.” And about then his walkie talkie went off informing him that we already had a runner in

Michigan Bluff. He was about an hour earlier than expected so we got our team picture and then all ran off to handle our stations. Buses. I got buses. Lester

had that handled so I asked him if I could get a picture of the first guy coming through.
About 40 minutes later I saw Hal Koerner (who won WS100 in 07 and 09) take off like a bullet up past the aid station to run in with Tim Olson. He was blur of

running shorts and muscles. “Whoa, those are really short shorts.” It was like watching a horse run…in short, shorts. A few minutes later I saw both of them

come running in. Hal and Tim all smiles and waving at the crowd. To say he was in the aid station less than a minute doesn’t do it justice. He was there just

long enough to weigh in and was gone again. Possibly 18 seconds max. He did not look like he had just ran 63 miles. There wasn’t enough time to figure it

out, he was a blur as he ran out of the aid station and down the street where he was greeting with wild cheers from crews waiting for their runner and people

just wanting to shout words of encouragement to the runners. Someone had said it during the day, “this is more than a sporting event. This is a show.” And

now I understood.
One of the aid station workers who has been doing this for nearly 20 years said to his runner as he greeted him, “Now the race has really started. This is where

it gets good!” The runner smiled knowingly at his greeter and took off. It wasn’t until I watched Unbreakable later that night that I understood that. Foresthill is

the point where you are either in this race or you’re not. This is the make you or break you portion of the race.

As the next few runners came in I got to watch as the fellow aid station people ran them in. I walked up to the head of the trail and hung out with those guys for

awhile. Hands down there was no sweeter, nicer, warm hearted people alive.
“What’cha doin, guys?” I asked as I watched them checking their paperwork. They explained that as the runner comes in you run with them, take their water

bottles, make sure they cross over the timing mat, get to the weigh station, get their water filled, get them whatever they ask for all while running.
“Wanna give it a try?”
OH MY GOD. DO I WANT TO GIVE IT A TRY?! I could see the next runner coming in and I squealed “YES!” They let me cut in line and off I went with the

runner. I got his water bottles and asked him what he wanted. “My wife. I want my wife.”
Okay, this guy has been running for 60 miles and could be a bit loopy. “If she’s here, she’s in the aid station. As soon as you guys are announced we let in

your crew.” He got his now filled water bottles and saw his wife. He ran over to her, got a kiss and left. That’s what he required at our aid station. She travelled

God knows how many miles, caught shuttles, carted all his gear around and what got him through to this point in his race was a kiss. AMAZING and

BEAUTIFUL at the same time.

Ellie came in a bit later and I had read about her in about 700 articles in the last year and they don’t do her justice. She has this look in her eye that is 100%

focus. She’s aware of everyone around her, but you can see that she is all strategy and determination at the rawest form. Then you see her stomach. JESUS

CHRIST that woman is toned. It was outstanding! Could I PLEASE stop staring at this woman’s abs!?
No. I couldn’t stop. I heard Gordy in my head (like always lately) “How bad do you want it?” FUCK. If wanting it to the point of crushing the women’s course

record this year means having a stomach you can grate cheese on, YEAH…THAT BAD.

Then something awesome happened. I was talking to the Injinji rep about photography and saw this guy with a crazy tshirt. I excused myself and made my

way over to him. He was smiling and talking to this pacer and his daughter. I was just going to sneak in a quick picture and then he turned and faced me

straight on. I’m not kidding, I took a step back. He was on the other side of the aid station tape that kept all the people out of the restricted area. “OH MY GOD.

YOU’RE COWMAN!” I jumped the aid station tape and he engulfed me into the biggest hug I have ever had.
“and you are?” he squeezed so tight that he smashed his bag of strawberries he was holding.
“I’m Kristine. I uh.” I had nothing to say.
Then he did something that blew my mind, “Thank you, Kristine. Thank you for volunteering your time for us. It means a lot to us.” Then and there I was

reminded I was actually a race official at this damn thing.
“You just thanked ME?” We sat and talked about Hawaii, family, the runners, his hat and what he does in between running. Fifteen minutes he talked to me as

if I had something important to tell him. All the while a group of fans began to gather around him. I told him I would see him around and I instantly had to see

Lester. I jumped back over the wall and made my way back to him in a blur of tears. He was chatting with the bus driver as I leaned up against the door.

“Cowman. I just met Cowman.” …and THANK YOU, LESTER for knowing who I was talking about! He understood to the best of his ability what I was feeling

since he was there when I got to run with Gordon a few months ago.
Throughout the next couple of hours, Cowman and I would start talking again. Each time he would give me a hug and tell me something about his time or

point out who someone was for me.
Back at the bus Lester said, “There’s Gordon.” I yelled out, “GORDON!” he turned around and mumbled something and kept walking as if he was in a daze,

completely surrounded by people. “What did he say?” We both asked each other. The guy standing in line said, “I got pulled at Robbinson.”
Oh hell. He didn’t make the cutoff. I was nearly certain he was going to make the whole 100 this year. I met up with Cowman later and he said that he though

Gordon might still be in a bit of shock.
A while later I saw Gordon and gave him a big hug. “how you doing sweetie?” and then his rapid fire questions cam at me. “I’m riding now like you said to

do!” He smiled and said, “good, run twice instead of three days and keep riding. Where’s The Natural?” I turned and pointed to Lester who was helping

people on the bus. He smiled and said, “Now you get serious, Kristine. Train hard.” He told me he was a bit disappointed that he got pulled because he had

two people from southern California here with him.
I told him I got to meet Cowman, he looked up scanning the crowd of people and said, “Hawaii ruined him.” He gave me a quick hug and told me he had to

go.

Seriously, could this day get better?

Cowman caught up with me again and asked if he could catch a ride to the finish line when we headed down. ARE YOU SHITTING ME? Yes. OF COURSE.

Around 6:00, Lonnie found two people to take over and Lester got the truck. We loaded up all the stuff we brought and a Cowman. I sat in the back and

listened as Lester and Cowman chatted the whole way. We pulled into Auburn at the finish line and Lester jumped out and said he wanted a picture. My smile

was so big as I took the picture.
Cowman asked Lester if he was going to the finish line and I don’t even think Lester realized he said it, but he said, “I’ll see it one day when I cross over it.”
I lead Cowman down to the track and he told me, “My favorite was getting me 1000 mile buckle. I’m proud of that.” He wanted to desperately show me the cow

horn helmet and so off we went to find the drop bags. There is a whole section of the field set up for drop bags and since he was 00, his was at the front, but

the horns weren’t there.
“It’s okay, I’ll see them next year.”
We got a couple of guys that had been following us from the gate to get a picture and in return I took a picture of them with him too. “A LEGEND!” they both

said.
He gave me another hug and I pointed to his safety pins. I had told him about how I don’t have my bibs or anything on display, but I do keep my safety pins

in an old jar my mom had given me. “I have never heard of anyone saving their safety pins. That’s kind of neat.” He let me take two of the 4 pins holding his

bib onto his shorts. “Thank you.” I said and again, he thanked me. “Thank you for today. Thank you for Ohana. For the ride. For the great talk. For being

good people.” And I got another hug and kiss. “You promise to email me!” he demanded and made me repeat his email address to prove to him I had it

memorized.

I ran off the last bit of track, the same track that Tim Olson would be on winning Western States 100 mile and setting a course record 30 minutes later.

Six months ago I had no idea that this would be yet another day that would shape my future and how I would be blessed.
Later that night when Lester and I had made it home and had beer in hand I asked him what his favorite part of the day was. Without hesitation he said, “The

drive home and talking to Cowman.”
I shook my head in agreement. There were so many things I could list off that made it “the best day”, but thinking back on it a day later, the best part was

having Lester there with me, sharing in all ‘the best’ moments I had.

“Love it or Leave it.” Is what Cowman’s hat had handwritten on it.

I take the “love it” part.

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23
Jun
I shit you not!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Western States 100 Mile Endurance Run 2012, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

I have a whole post on this REMARKABLE day, but right now I am just too overwhelmed by the enormity of it all.

Watching Tim come flying into the aid station at Foresthill way ahead of time was one of those moments you don’t forget. Hearing them announce Ellie as the

first female runner through….I squealed and clapped as I watched this woman with amazing focus come running in (along with every other aid station worker)

After that I stumbled upon a man with a crazy beard and awesome shirt and when I approached him, “No way! COWMAN!” he gave me a big hug and I got to

talk to him for about 15 minutes. When I got back to Lester I was all tears. “Cowman.” was about all I could muster as an explanation.

This is where the “I shit you not” part come in….
Lester and I drove Cowman from Foresthill to Auburn. NICEST GUY EVER. Him and Lester chatted it up on the way back as I texted a friend “no fucking way! i

have COWMAN IN MY TRUCK!”

When we got him to the finish line, I told him how I keep my running bib safety pin. He gave me 2 of his from this years race.
He then gave me one of the 10 hugs he had given me through the day and then gave me a kiss.

Lester texts me, “CMON NOW!”

LOL.

BEST DAY EVER!!!

More later about the amazing people I worked with today.

Oh, and my shirt…it says “Race Official” Yeah…it says that. right there. on my shirt.

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22
Jun
The couple that gave me my start!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


The couple that gave me my start!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

I was driving home the other day after dropping the girls off with Paw Paw in Reno and since my stereo sucks ass I had to listen to what was going on in my

head.
I passed through the town that I had done a photoshoot in and it got me to thinking about this couple.

Alyx had a field trip to the “Puzzle People” and I had taken some interesting pictures while I was there and I sent the pictures to the couple after I got home

and played with them a bit. She asked me if I would come up and shoot her grandkids when they came to town.
I agreed even though at that point I had not ever done a paid photo shoot. I had gone to a couple weddings and did some free work to get the hang of it, but

they had a different photographer there.
I was more nervous about getting lost driving up to their business than I was of actually doing the shoot.

The kids were cute and very polite, but I needed a better backdrop. They suggested we drive a ways up to their home and get pictures there. When I pulled up

to their home I nearly cried because it was the home I had always dreamed of having. A cabin in the woods. They walked me around their property and I got

the pictures and listened to their story of their home, what plants were which and I was in awe of the love they had for each other. At the time I wasn’t married

to DB and I am not certain we even lived together yet, but I wanted so badly what they had. He would reach over and grab her hand as they walked through the

property and they would laugh at the memory of when they put in the new bridge or when the dogs would completely ignore the bridge and go lay in the water.
This is what I wanted so much. Someone to share this kind of love with even when were both long past sexy and rolling into ‘adorable’.

She handed me the check for the photoshoot and I was so excited I didn’t want to even cash it.
This couple gave me my start in photography. I’m most proud of this because it was by myself and because it was then I learned what I wanted most in life.

This picture to me everything all in one. MY photography. The love I will always strive to provide and earn. To be gentle and gracious with this life.

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21
Jun
Heeee’ssss BACK!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Bryan, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

This is my wonderful friend, Bryan. He has been in and out of my life since 1990 and has seen me through some crazy parts in my life.

I met Bryan when I worked at KEWB in Redding as a DJ. Bryan was the news guy. He was more friends with Dan, but we could talk. Then he moved back to

Barstow and I remember that day like it was yesterday. Our program director played “Goodbye Stranger” as he talked about Bryan’s time with B94 and wished

him well on his new adventure.
I would have never guessed 22 years later we would still be friends and how big his adventure would be.

Back in 1992 he called Dan to see if he could crash on the couch for a couple of days while he took an interview at the news station in town and of course we

agreed. Bryan never left. It was fun having him stay with me because Dan worked out of town and Bryan was much better company than the dog I had

convinced Dan I must have. A week turned into a month and then a few more went by and one day Bryan and I decided we should just rent a house. That is

what we did. We sat down and pulled out a newspaper and found a house, rented it, moved all our stuff in. This all happened in the span of about 2 days. Dan

was out of town so when he came home we had to give him directions to where we now lived.
I got married, he was there. I got pregnant and he had to suffer through me freaking out that NO ONE, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES was allowed to cook

ground beef if I was in the house. NO ONE was allowed to wear cologne. NO ONE was allowed to even mention the fact they could hear me throwing up for

hours on end.
We decided we needed a new house and we moved again, with Bryan packing up all his stuff and finding the room he liked best, even if it was right next to the

nursery.
He learned to not bring Hostess Cherry Pies home unless he wanted to be mauled before he could get the wrapper off. He took it all in stride when I would call

his work in a near panic because there was a Pepsi and Snickers bar and the fridge and if I didn’t eat it at that exact moment, my child might come out

sideways as revenge.

Then Kara was born and he was the first non-family member to hold her. He said, “Hello, Kara Bear. I’m your uncle Bryan.” and he watched her as she learned

how to roll over and the fear and excitement showed every time she tried something new. “DID YOU SEE THAT?”

Then he decided it was time to move to into Sacramento and then to SF and my heart broke, but I was also happy to start my life as well.
I knew my days of musicals, ballets, opera and crazy foreign films were over.

We have kept in touch through the years and thank you Facebook for allowing me to watch my friend Flash Mob to Janet Jackson. I cried with pride as I

watched him go through his classes and finally seeing him on his big day.
That is one thing I have always been when it comes to Bryan, is proud. He’s a good man that I wish only the best that life has to offer. He is a dreamer, poet, a

comedian, writer…a dear friend.

He had been more in contact with me now that he is moving back to Sacramento. My hope for him is that he settles into his life here, he finds his spot that

makes him find all the peace his life needs and that he meets the man of his dreams because no one deserves love more than my friend, Bryan. He has a

huge heart and so much to offer.

Welcome home, buddy!

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16
Jun
Shea loved the view!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Shea loved the view!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Went to go rent a car and the stupid place has a new policy and tried to charge me 60 bucks. HELL NO. We went to the next place. 90 bucks. OH HELLLLLLLL

NO.
Decided to go get a bite to eat and then just hit the freeway and decided to end up where we wanted to end up.
Decided to go to Stinson Beach. Got lost…SO lost. I swear, I looked for the exit, they must have moved it.
Ended up in Berkeley, so I parked the car and caught BART into the city.
Shea said she didn’t remember ever being there. I shit you not, DB and I took her there at least 3 times…AT LEAST!
We keep pointing to stuff and and asking her, “Do you remember this time?…what about that? remember this one time?”
I started to feel bad and then felt like maybe she had brain damage.
She said, “I remember things. I just forgot everything we did with him.”

OUCH.

Alyx and I said, “You’ll remember THIS trip though!” and took her to all the places that we liked to go. The donut place, to the sea lions, to go stare out at

Alcatraz. I promised her that I would take them there soon. Kara and I had a great time when we went for her 16th birthday and now that the girls are older, I

really think they will like it.

We saved our money so we could catch a rickshaw back to the BART station and when we saw the one and only guy with a fuzzy seat we knew we had to get

that one. It was hands down the best part of the trip! He was weaving through traffic coming less than an inch next to the cars as he sped through traffic. Shark

fining the fuzzy all the way back. Shea had a shit eatin’ grin the whole back. She asked Alyx if she was enjoying the view, but Alyx was staring up at the

building.

It was a good day getting lost and going on an adventure with the brats.

I’m down to single digits before Kara gets home!!

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16
Jun
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Just peeking, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I tried. I gave 100%.

I’m not good enough.

Gordon was wrong.

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14
Jun
Dear Denise Richards,
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


ripped., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I am begging you to stop going on Access Hollywood Live.
I loves me some Charlie, I ADORE you and that you stayed out the media when he was going through batshit crazy phase. You didn’t have a single thing to

say even though everyone was baiting you into saying something. You’re a woman so I know you had some shit to say, but for the well being of your

daughters you handled it with such grace and poise. I may or may not have been so generous if my dumb ass ex husbands had been going through it and

looking like a loon. In fact, they did and I did my best to shut up, but when their actions were hurting my girls, I had to say something. That opened the flood

gates and I wish I could say I regret it, but I don’t. We all have our own paths.

So, now to Access Hollywood thing. I am so tired of those two spending 15 of the 20 minutes of the interview hounding you about Charlie. You’re so much

more than his exwife. Don’t they read your Twitter?
Yes, you two get along and I have a great relationship with my ex (when he’s not being a complete jackass) and we do a lot for the girls and they see how

much each one of us does. It’s not so abnormal. When he remarries (and I truly hope he does) we won’t be able to be friends like we are now, and that’s

alright I guess.

So what I am asking is if you do go on their show again, can you please ask them to leave you and Charlie out of it? I would LOVE to watch an interview about

YOU. You’re an amazing, wonderful mother who does so much.

If they want to hear about Charlie, let them interview him.

Kristine

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13
Jun
Kara comes home soon
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Steven’s Trail, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
in less than two weeks.

Alyx is doing the countdown of days for us.

I love this picture.

:)

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17
Jul
Okay this is just stupid…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Shrek foot, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
My calves are KILLING ME.

I’m taking my friend Mara out for a nice 15 miler this weekend.

I think i’ll wear my Brooks until I rebuild up the calves.

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17
Jul
it’s my own damn fault
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Untitled, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Okay, yesterday sucked as far as the ‘ouch’ factor.
Today is ridiculous. I got up this morning to make my coffee and my calves are not helping me even a little bit.
The coffee got made and I penguined my way back to the bedroom with my cup. After I drank that cup, I got up and walked the 17 steps to the coffee pot to

refill it and realized I left my cup 17 steps away. I actually contemplated just getting a new cup because those 17 steps to get the cup and the 17 steps back to

the kitchen just might kill me.

It didn’t, but OUCH.

I think I might be okay had I wore my Brooks, but because I wear Vibrams when I run, I just have to pay the price of sore calves when I push myself.

It’s worth it, but OUCH.

I’ve been watching the news non-stop to keep tabs on the Robber Fire. I know the area very well that it’s burning. That area is where I run on the weekends. As

of last night it was a mile and a half from my favorite trail. The people that live there have been evacuated and my thoughts and prayers are with them. As of

this morning it’s 50% contained.

Thank you, firefighters!!

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16
Jul
Almost perfect Sunday…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


mine mine mine!, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I can’t remember how long it has been since I have been out on my trails running and I wanted to start this tradition that after every Western States 100 mile

endurance race I would do a part of the trail I have never done. Last year I did Rucky Chucky and this year I did Michigan Bluff.
Holy shitballs this is a doozy!
It’s 2,000+ feet of elevation loss and gain in 5 miles (I started my watch at the car so it added the extra mile bringing it to six) and WHOOOO boy! I haven’t been

this sore since I did Euchie Bar. This was kind of similar, but without the awesome payout at the end.
I can eat the downhill sections of most any trail, but this one had my legs getting a little jelloish. I’m going to do it again and again to see if I was just out of

shape or if my legs don’t like that grade of downhill. The same grade was going back up. OUCH. I thought I was doing pretty good the first half mile, but then I

got tired and had to go straight mental to get back up.
Today…I can feel it.

I went to Lester’s game and he came over afterward and knowing I was sore was very sweet and gentle with me. He helped stretch out the sore legs *wiggling

eyebrows*.
This was one of the coolest things, I told him about an idea I had involving the TV and the McMansion and he didn’t say one single thing to discourage me.
I’m not saying that he ever does that to me, but this was so refreshing to be able to suggest an idea and not feel discouraged afterward. I almost burst into

tears.

On a different note, I sent an email to New Balance and hopefully they will donate a couple pairs of running shoes so Tabitha’s step son and step daughter in

law can start doing some walking with me. In an email I asked her if she would do the Color Run with us. Bridget is overweight and I don’t want anyone to

think I am pushing anything on any one or trying to say anything mean by suggesting she start walking with me. I just know how that feels to feel stuck and I

know that once I told myself, “I can, despite my fear” there was nothing I couldn’t do.
Yesterday 2 miles into this steep canyon I knew that coming back out was going to hurt, but I knew I could do it.
If I could get myself into something, I could get myself out of it too. Then about mile 5 coming back up I thought about the CANT situations.
‘What if I sprained my ankle?’ I would still have to get out of this canyon. ‘well, what if I BROKE my leg’…I would still have to get out of this canyon and I

would have to find a way to walk or crawl to the car.
That thought alone was so empowering at that moment because I had two fully functioning legs and I could do it.
I want everyone to be able to have that mindset. The trails do that for me because you can’t just call someone to pick you up, you got there, you gotta climb

back out.
Quitting no matter what the circumstance is not an option.

And now I need to figure out how to stand up without yelping in pain.

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15
Jul
Still diggin…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Sit, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I found this bad boy in my files today. It made me smile because of the conversation I had to have with this woman before I took her picture.

I’m killing time outside of the Sacramento Horror Film festival, not really wanting to be there. It wasn’t my thing, but the ex had volunteered for it and had

been taking pictures all day. I just wanted the kids to be able to meet the two celebs that would be there.
There is this beautiful woman sitting in this chair and I’m standing a ways away smoking a cigarette. I keep staring at her shoes and her tattoo. Tattoos are not

my thing, but she seems to be rocking the tacky top of foot tattoo. She turns around and I must have had this half disgusted, have enthralled look on my face.

Realizing this I say hello and tell her I liked her shoes, so much in fact that I wanted to take a picture of them. She smiled and said, “Uh sure.” I get a picture

of the shoes and realize it’s not the shot I wanted.
Now this is where it gets weird.
“Can you cross your leg in a way that I can see the tattoo.”
She must have seen my disgust look from earlier, “Really? thought you didn’t like it much.” Yep. She saw it.
I got called on my shit and I would have to be honest because the knot in my stomach would have it no other way.
“I’m sorry. I just don’t really like tattoos so much and don’t like roses.”
Yeah, that’s right there in chapter one of How To Win Friends and Influence People.
“that came out wrong, I mean it’s true, but it sounded bitchy and snobby.”
She actually laughed and she was nice to me even though outside of saying I liked her shoes, I pretty much insulted her.
We started talking about photography and how she had done some photo shoots in the past. (I’m not certain, but I think her photo shoots were R rated, not

sure)
By the end of our conversation we had drug out this chair from a sitting area and aligned it just so it was half pavement and half the entrance to the theater. I

must have taken about 30 photos, but it was this one that we both agreed was the hottest of them all.
She was so sweet when she said, “it’s my tacky rose top of the foot tattoo with my sexy shoes.”
Oh. God.
I’m sure she still tells that story.

So lady, if you’re reading this, I got a tacky tattoo on my foot.

I’m already thinking about my next one. Alyx keeps doodling this infinity symbol with the number 13 on it. It’s a Taylor Swift thing, but I don’t care. I’ve seen

this thing on my daughter for about 6 months straight (she draws it on every day)
Everyone knows that 13 is my favorite number (and Kara’s…and probably Alyx’s too now) and it always has and probably always will be.

Boundless. Forever.

It fits.

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13
Jul
Oh Happy Day!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Shoes first outting., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE Friday the 13th!!

I was up way too late last night though working on a design that I am over the moon excited about. I found a way to fix the part of it that I wasn’t too happy with

how it turned out.

Last night all my stuff was sprawled out on my coffee table and I thought about how I would design my stu-stu-studio. I like the low to the ground table and it

would allow the girls and Ben to be able to come in and make stuff with me. I think Lester has plans of lightly sanding the coffee table and using it for the

living room, but he changes his mind about stuff. I would like to not put it in storage, so I will find a way to use it.
I’ve finally got the living area designed, but my stu-stu-studio is what keeps me up at night searching for the exact design I want.

I could pee myself I am so happy. I had forgotten what ‘hopeful’ feels like. Feels good to be back here.

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12
Jul
Digging through old photos….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Digging through old photos…., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
In Sept of 2005 I shelled out a lot of money for my Sigma macro lens. It’s still a purchase I never regretted. After I got it, I hated it because I couldn’t get it to

work the way I thought it should. Come to find out, I just sucked at macro photography…or so I thought. Bringing back the macro lens the guy said he

wouldn’t take it until I had taken a thousand pictures with it. I was pissed and teary, but I decided to do what he asked so I could bring it back. Thank God he

didn’t take it back.

Now I am slowly getting back into photography so I am going through my ‘kristine pictures taken with macro’ file I had on my external hard drive. I think every

picture I took from 2005 to 2009 was with that lens because the file is HUGE. I wouldn’t let anyone use that lens!! I was pretty selfish.
OKAY OKAY OKAY, I am still kind of protective over it even though it’s broke and would cost me a lot to fix…but I just work with the broken side and make it

work.

I know it’s going to take a lot to get me all the way back in. Maybe I won’t be as obsessed as I was before. Who knows.
In a couple of months I will have my own area to create and design and I am over the top happy to have that space to call my own.
I have designed and redesigned the area and where I am going to put my macdaddy photo printer and all my gear. *pee pee tingle*

I’m coming back slowly.

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11
Jul
I do love him!!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


My morning text to the man I love., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

it’s written in sand. it’s now on the internet. must be true.

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10
Jul
overcast = sun burnt to a crisp
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


stinson beach, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
My tits are two glowing orbs right now! I never sun burn and I have gotten two this month!

The girls were promised a trip to Stinson Beach for body boarding. I was invited and decided to go just to get some pictures of Dan with all his girls. Not sure

when we will get the opportunity to do this again with Kara’s sporadic visits.
I drove myself because I wasn’t sure if I would be called into to do scorekeeping for a late game. This saved me from hours of anxiety of riding with Dan and

reminded me of what a bad ass I am at driving winding roads. It also showed me that my car can climb hills.

Alyx rode home with me and she kept playing music that was putting me in a weird mood. She played a Disney song and then started talking about our trip to

Disneyland, the drive there and everyone in the car singing. As much as Shea doesn’t remember, Alyx makes up for it for remembering everything. I’m going

to take her to Maui so she has stories that will make Disneyland seem like getting shots at the doctor.

Now it’s off to bathe in some aloe and hope I didn’t get sun poisoning.

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05
Jul
SHE’S MARRIED!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Hamilton Wedding, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
It was a beautiful day for a wedding this July 4th.

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03
Jul
Go4it!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Why my friends are more bad ass than your friends:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JH-6RrvjZv4

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31
Jul
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


My new car decal…and future tattoo., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I had a great time with my friend the other night. We went to dinner and then ended up sitting by the pool talking until almost 2 am!
Sunday I worked a couple of shifts for one of the guys at work.
Monday, my friend Mark came to hang out and run errands with me. Yes, I know how to entertain!
I got called in to cover another shift on Monday.

Tonight is date night. It’s going to be sweep out and get spiders out of the storage shed night though.
About a year or so ago I went out into the sheds at Lester’s place and he should be getting rent from all the spiders living in there. All of my stuff is in plastic

bins, but those spiders can get in anywhere so I think once a month I will drop a spider bomb in there just to make sure they don’t make a home in my photo

albums and kitchenware. I’ve been known to just toss a whole box because it had a well fed spider in it.

My run is this weekend. I took a very graceful and majestic fall on the ice on Sunday and the bruises keep getting bigger and more painful. I don’t have knee

wraps to make sure they don’t hurt worse…but if they get any darker and hurty, I am going to go buy some.
After the run I have to go to work. That should be interesting because I don’t know if the ‘paint’ will come off very well.

:)

Oh, this is the decal I got! Remember when I said I was getting a new tattoo? this is what it’s going to look like!

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28
Jul
So Unfair…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


IMG_7736211, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Took the Girls and Jeremiah to the state fair on Thursday.
I usually get to ride about 2 rides per fair visit. We love the tiltawhirl and this ride (in picture). The unlimited ride wrist bands were 30 bucks each so I only got

the girls and Jeremiah one and they used the hell out of them. It costs about 4 bucks a ride normally so it worked out pretty good.
I went to go buy my two tickets and the guy behind the glass gave me two free rides. Score. Just saved myself 10 bucks.

This ride is the one that spins around in circles and rocks side to side almost upside down. I love that sick to your stomach feeling you get the first time you

hit the highest point and you come out of your seat and then it whips you around. I looked at Kara who had been riding these all night while I roamed around

with Shea and Jeremiah who don’t like the scary rides, and she looked a bit green.
My feet kicked out in front of me, I screamed, “I LOVE THIS RIDE!!! I LOVE THE FAIR!!”
knowing I would be hating the fair after the contents of my stomach tried to work its way out.
The fun was over to fast and I wanted to get right back on it after I got off it, but I decided to wait so Alyx could ride one ride with me.

I am always in search of something that will scare the shit out of me. This was just a gentle reminder of how much I love that rush.

Kara left today. It’s been a rough couple of days for me. Tabitha and the kids moved to West Sacramento and as much as I know they are happy now in a new

place starting their new life…i’m going to just miss them all so much. I’m going to miss Jeremiah’s face every morning and the end less questions and the

dancing/singing with the girls when they got home from school. I’m going to miss RinaRoo coming over and laughing. I’m going to miss my coffee time with

my friend where we can catch up, talk, vent and talk each other off the ledge.

Tonight I have a date with one of my other friends. (this name shall go unlisted in fear of losing her to the dark side)
She needs to vent and I need to focus on someone else’s bullshit to get my mind off my own.

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27
Jul
Closing Time…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Closing Time…, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

i am just so fucking tired.

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26
Jul
I shit you not!
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


alehouse hockey, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
So I have been scorekeeping for about a month now at the local hockey rink. It’s a fun job, but it’s a part/part/part time thing and I do it mostly because it’s

fun…not because I am making millions.
Tonight I was scorekeeping for a game and it started getting dirty. High sticking, slashing and tripping. During the 15 minutes of the game one guy (who

always seems to be the target of getting beat the fuck up) gets a penalty for cross checking another player. The other player begins to circle around the two

refs and the player that cross checked him and is doing the ‘wah-wah’ baby face and taunting him, “oooh, poor baby, you sad?”
The player just gets into the penalty box while the other guy is calling out names and trying to insult his mother. The refs call an unsportsman’s like conduct

to the guy that cross checked him and all the sudden all hell breaks loose.
“ARE YOU FUCKIN’ KIDDING ME!? HE CROSS CHECKED ME!” and now he’s the victim…seeming to forget he was just being a douche to the guy.
Now I have two players in the penalty box beside me and the two are going at each other with the stupidest insults I have heard.
“Oh yeah, your mother sucks…MY BIG DICK.” and then does some crude rocking motion with his hockey stick.
I’m trying to input the penalties and get the game restarted, but I can’t hear the refs calls.
I turn and look at the first guy, “SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP LONG ENOUGH FOR ME TO INPUT THIS!” He shuts up.
I turn to the other guy, “YOU SHUT IT! I’M SICK OF HEARING IT!” and he is clearly on a roll with his ‘yo momma’ jokes and just rolls his eyes at me.
“Don’t roll your eyes at me.” and I go back to inputting the information in.
Just as I am about to get to the part where I find out of the penalty is a major or minor and how many minutes they both start up again, yelling at each other

through the glass.
“ENOUGH! SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU OR I AM CHANGING THE PLAYLIST FOR THE REST OF THE GAME TO PLAY NOTHING BUT JUSTIN BEIBER AND I WILL

TELL ALL THESE GUYS THAT YOU REQUESTED IT!”

It worked long enough for me to input the times and then they started up again.
“You’re stupid!” “No you’re stupid.”

The ref came up to me and was laughing because I went all old school mom on them. Hands on my hips, eyebrows raised and the look of ‘test me, child’ on

my face.
“I can’t believe you threatened two grown adults with Justin Beiber.”

When the penalty time was up I yelled at both of them, “GET THE HELL OUT OF MY PENALTY BOX AND BEHAVE YOURSELF!”

Come to find out the one guy who was all crazy, well he’s kind of crazy. I’m talking the batshit crazy variety of crazy.

He winked at me on the way out of the rink.

Officially creeped out now.

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24
Jul
Reading…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Reading…, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Kara and I were cruising around and I was in search of a new book. I can read a book in a night so I am always in search of something new. She picked this

up as a joke to show me and I noticed it was written by the same woman who wrote, ‘eat, pray, love’ and I really liked the book because I was able to relate to

her crying in the shower and being a ball of sadness on the floor wishing she could just escape.
I bought the book and started reading it a week ago. It’s not an easy read for me because I am absorbing what she’s saying. It’s not a love story by any means

and the relationship she has with the man she loves is very much like the one Lester and I have.
We are together, we love each other, we are going to try to not hurt each other and it might end up a horrible disaster, but we are going to try. We don’t need a

piece of paper to prove it.
I said I will love him forever. Now “forever” is a mighty long time….(shit, just quoted Prince) “forever” to me is a promise of now. That makes no sense. Okay,

the way I love him right now is what I will strive to do for the rest of my life. That’s my forever. It’s a ridiculous amount of love and if I play my cards right and

he still smiles at me and kisses the back of my neck expectantly… then I think I can spread that love out until the end of our life together.

We have both said ‘forever’, ’till death do us part’ and as much as I dream of the ‘death’ part for one of my ex’s…it didn’t work out ‘forever…or until death do

us part’ for either of us.
In fact, the ‘forever’ part of the promise I made lasted until the about the 5th time I found my ex had no respect for the vows we had made. Then the ‘forever’

love was replaced with, ‘this is the bed I made…’ and did my best to get through it.
For Lester i’m sure he has his own story about how it felt to be betrayed and the staggering end to the ‘forever’ promise he made too.

How do two people make peace with that and hope their relationship doesn’t turn into a cautionary tale of, ‘rebound’ disaster?
Let’s be clear here, I believe in marriage. I think it’s a beautiful union and there is nothing that makes my heart soar more than the two words; husband and

wife. Those are the most powerful words I can think of that are tied to the word ‘love’.
I just can’t buy into the legalized marriage anymore though. The more I read about it, the more it pisses me off.
The dumbass forgot to click a box when filing our divorce papers that would automatically give me my last name back. Because it wasn’t checked, I have to

come up with the money to petition the court to have my name changed. A box. A fucking box. That is what it is now, just a series of boxes and ways to divide

what was once one.
I don’t want that. Isn’t there something else? This book might have it in there. So far she has nailed how I feel about it. She has to get married though or her

boyfriend is going to be deported.
This should be good.

On that note, I give my one month notice to my apartment and I will move in with Lester. This is a huge step for me. I’m scared.
I get pissed really easy because I am stubborn and I enjoy my single life. This freedom to place a picture frame here or move every pot and pan to a different

cupboard because I am having a feeling it would be easier to reach is liberating. No one questions when I change the bedding 3 different times in a month. No

one complains about the sheer volume of pillows or the fact that I have a 4 different pairs of shoes in every single room. No one cares that I clean the toilet 4

times a week or that I have a weird way of folding towels so they fit into a small space. This is something I take for granted until I am at his place and I actually

fear of doing something wrong. Placing something in the wrong spot. Moving something.
In spite of all the fear that is actually making me lose feeling in my hands as I type that last paragraph, I want to be there with him. I want to so much it makes

my heart ache. This though…is going to be the biggest clash of stubborn wills that ever was.

He will win every single time if he kisses the back of my neck and just gives me that smile. Shhhh, don’t tell him that though.

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23
Jul
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
Flooring.

Check out that beautiful flooring!
I just found out that the man I love doesn’t like dark wood anything.  I would sand every bit of furniture I own and go dark with it if I could.  I just might do that

too.
We have differing opinions on what we like.  it’s going to happen a lot in our relationship.   He hates my french nails and I think they are beautiful.  He doesn’t

like a lot of people, I love most everyone (except for the ones that I think are bitter, tacky, classless and mean).
When it comes to flooring for the McMansion though, since I am going to pay for it and have it installed, I would like to go with what I like. I like the dark

hardwood.  There is a good chance I am going to go with fluffy comfy carpet with padding so thick I will hit my head on the low ceiling when I am walking

through to my ubber soft bed.

Yes, a little obsessed.

I have a week left to decide if I am going to get the drafting table.

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22
Jul
and again with the running….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


This was the text that started after I posted on Facebook:
“Sure I’ll work Friday until midnight!”
“Sure we can go on a hike leaving at 7am on Saturday!”

I wish my insomnia had let me know it had plans when I was making mine, “Sure I will play ‘call me maybe’ over and over and over in your head rendering

you stupid and unable to sleep but one precious hour!”

At 6am Mara started texting. I wasn’t even asleep, but I didn’t want to dislodge myself out of bed.  She would never let me live it down if I didn’t though.
She shows up at 7am with beer and ice for the chest. Lester packed up his bike and we hit McDonalds for the sausage mcmuffin ritual. I hate 1 full one and

just the sausage from the second.
I was tired when we hit the trailhead, but I have felt worse on a run and it was only going to be 6 miles…in full sun. I should be okay.

A mile in I knew this was going to be rough. By the second mile I was debating my ability to make it the whole six.



Mara came up behind me and just kicked me right in the ass. “MOVE IT!” and she took off in the cutest run ever. My first mile is usually brutal on me, maybe

it would only be the 2 miles and I would be alright.

Mile 3 I was telling her, “I think I need to puke.”  You would think that would bring a tad bit of sympathy. Her response was to grab her cell phone and ask

nicely, “When you do, please do it in the sun because I get bad lighting for pictures in the shade.”
She ran ahead and I found a nice spot in the shade to reexamine my choice of breakfast.  Did I not even chew it when I ate it an hour ago? it didn’t look like it.

Okay, NOW I should feel better?  I caught back up to her right before the Knickerbocker canyon creek.  This is the prettiest part of the run and I told her to not

waste it. I was feeling dizzy so I would just jog down it instead of tearing down it like I like to.  She took off and I made it to the creek. Normally it’s flowing and

beautiful, today it was just a wide stagnant pool of stenchy water.   The climb out was so damn hard. This is a hard climb, but with nothing left I was nearly

certain I was going to burn an hour getting out of there. I would take 15 steps and it would feel like I going to die.  I would repeat this about 50 more times

before I was done.  I stopped at the first corner out and decided to send a text to Mara and Lester to let them know I was almost out of the canyon, but instead

my head felt heavy and apparently I blacked out.
Not certain how long I was out, but I figured my body needed to rest so I didn’t freak out about it too much. My right side of my head hurt so I guess I hit a

rock.

I saw Mara at the top of the hill and she was adorable as she egged me on. “Mara I passed out. I am really dizzy.”  She showed fake sympathy and I love her

for it. “Okay, good…lets go.” and we started on the last 2 miles back.



We made it back to the Hummer and I found a hose and just drenched myself in it. She grabbed a beer and found Lester passed out in the back.
Apparently the trail was hard on him too.  It shouldn’t make me feel better, but it did knowing he threw up too.

That was hands down thee worst I have ever done on a trail. This includes the time we got lost and did 25 miles, my hip going out, the time I got sunstroke,

the time I ran out of water and the several trips I was attacked by mosquitoes.
It was still a beautiful day surrounded by the man I love with all my heart and my friend that I am so happy is a part of my life.

Later that day my sister came and stayed with me and Lester. It was a good Saturday despite the hurling black out.
My body isn’t sore at all…well, except that part of my head. ;)

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20
Jul
Running and running and running…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


hamilton, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I had posted a link on my facebook page, Run a 5k in 2012 with a picture of Birdie running and a little bit of her story on our official page.
Her husband had went out with her while she ran and took pictures of her and funny videos.
I love Birdies story. She’s just a cool person and I admire her.
This morning I find that Anywhere 5k has interviewed her too. I love that she mentions RA5k2012.

I got an email from New Balance and they are willing to donate 50 bucks to the new shoes. It’s a start and I am very grateful. I know the recipients of the shoes

will be very grateful and not waste the opportunity.
I am excited about the next run because it’s a fun one and 3 more people that can’t run yet are signed up and they are going to do this.
I think I am going to run a mile ahead and then run back and walk the rest of the mile with the person then at mile two do the same thing. If I am not going for

time (which I don’t normally do) I am going to have fun with it. Maybe seeing my fat ass run will get them to give it a try! :)

Tabitha and her husband, Billy are moving. I know I am moving too, but she’s moving first and she’s taking my little man and step daughter with her. *sigh*.

Change freaks me out. I’ve gotten better over the last few years and I try to embrace it and find the blessing in the change. We are both on the hunt for the

perfect pair of matching coffee cups so we can call each other and ‘have coffee together’.
I know that the last 3 years with Rina were my bonus years. Because of the divorce, there was a good chance I wouldn’t have gotten to see her, but because of

that divorce, Tabitha and I became close. She was there to get me through those mornings when I would wake up from a nightmare sobbing. She would tell

me, “i know…me too” when I would question why I felt a certain way about men, porn, being abandoned, the kids, lack of intimacy. She had been the only

person that had walked in my exact shoes and she was the one that held my hand and helped me through a really shitty time.
People may question our friendship and wonder how or why we are friends. Truth is, I think no matter how mad we get at each other about stupid things, she

will always remember how it was me that came got her from the hospital and it was me that nursed her back. It was her that listened, pep talked, showed me

that I could make it through it, I would survive. Through the years she would watch me relationship self destruct and she could pull me away from myself and

say, “cut him some slack. you’re acting like this because…” and she could point to the disaster of my last marriage and show me why I am behaving like a

crazy person.
For those reasons alone…I will always call her my friend.

…I want to go back to Maui.

(we don’t call this Random and Odd for nothing)

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19
Jul
everything is all right now….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


IMAG0636, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
In 2005 I bought my couch and love seat. In the last 7 years it has taken a good beating and all the pillow parts of the couch were looking pretty sad.

I’m moving in a month into a smaller place and I am lucky enough to have a place for all my stuff so I can recreate the ‘home’ I have. This space is smaller

than the apartment I am in, but I have gone over the space and I believe I can get about 75% of the major furniture comfortably placed in it.

The thing I am trying to avoid is making it look like a bunch of stuff crammed into a room. I want to create my space. I believe that if you love a room, you will

make it comfortable and cozy. I love my new space. I’ve been decorating and redecorating in my mind for about a month now. Yesterday I found a inexpensive

way to do the flooring and found paint for half the cost of Lowes. I’m still up in the air about the color though.

Yesterday I decided to give the couch cushions a little love. I got new stuffing, heavy duty thread and curved needle and began breathing new life into my

squishy cushions. They look like the day I brought them home and it only cost me about 30 dollars.

I found a good idea on organization for a small room on Pintrest. That stupid site might be part of my insomnia.

My life is about to take a very scary turn and I am going to take it on like I have tried to do with everything else, with grace.
Sometimes I look at the strange path that has brought me to where I am, who I am with and the people in my life.
Right now, this is the best part of my life. I feel like I am on the right road with the right person for me. Just thinking about him and our path makes me smile.

He makes me smile.

I’m going to be alright, everyone.

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19
Jul
Happy…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Is it smiling?, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

I have so many ideas about what I want to create that I am smiling all the time.

Everything I look at is art again. It’s a picture. It’s a design. It’s something to work with.

I found the design table I want.

I may just go and pay it a visit today.

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15
Aug
testing….
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


snapshots from the right side., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
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15
Aug
rocking this party 8 days a week…again.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


leaf in water, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

Sniffling, sneezing, coughing (like crazy)…

I’ve been working every day in a cold hockey rink nearly almost every day (it’s play offs) and when you have a cold and can’t breath it kind of sucks.
Went to yell at a player and went into a coughing frenzy.
Everyone was really nice (even the guy who got a cross check from behind for a 12 minute penalty)

Now I have a few days off before we start the championship games.
:::coughing::::

I’ll be glad when I’m over this one.

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11
Aug
RIP Mish.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


My trails are good listeners, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
You would think stepping away from skydiving and starting trail running I would lose less friends. This is not the case.

Since starting I can count 5 people we have lost. My heart breaks for their friends, family and fellow trail runners that have found comfort and inspiration in all

that they brought to our sport.

*hug* Sarah. I am so sorry for your loss. His amazing pictures, accomplishments and motivation to do more will be missed.

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10
Aug
*giggle*
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
For those of you that are not friends with me or Sheryl on Facebook…you missed this link she put up and that I hijacked.  Going through some stuff that

makes me forget to laugh and smile and THIS is what made me smile.
I’m taking the risk of getting that song stuck in my cold infested head, but it was worth it. So much that I watched it twice.

CHATROULETTE/BIKINI/CALL ME, MAYBE.

Have a fantastic Friday, everyone. I know I will.

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09
Aug
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


snapshots from the right side., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.

FREE AT LAST, FREEEEE AT LAST.

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07
Aug
just..ouch. OUCH.
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
In college we use to do shit like this, but not at this level. We would just tip toe around the corners of places to see if we could get in. We usually could. Have

enough computers to reroute shit and fellow students that just want to say they did it and you can accomplish anything online.
It was a benefit that we were all nerdy dorks that had no other life and I had really big kitchen and high speed internet.
Looking back now, it was stupid what we use to do.

I feel bad for this guy…but his hacker did make a point…shit’s not safe. fix it.

http://www.wired.com/gadgetlab/2012/08/apple-amazon-mat-honan-hacking
I don’t Apple or Icloud, but many of my friends do. Be careful.


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06
Aug
seemed fitting…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


over, over, over., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
This picture just seemed to fit what I am feeling at this moment.

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04
Aug
Color Run 2012
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


Color Run 2012, originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
Best 5k of all time!
Shea ran with me and she was just sooo happy the whole time.
We started off and I am use to trail running and dodging all kinds of crazy shit (yes, shit too) but here I am down at the state capitol, start the race and I hit a

rock. I HIT A FUCKING ROCK. Don’t even know where it came from, but if it was going to be in the road, I was going to be the one to trip over it. Really

though, the size of my behemoth head rock in the middle of a paved street?

I never run with my ipod or music (need to hear mountain lions and bears) but since I was on a street and everyone else was doing it, I turned mine on and off

I went…and it died like 2 minutes later. I have had zero luck with music on my runs so I said fuck it and just ran.

I put on my WS100 bandanna every time I ran through a color station so I wouldn’t inhale so much of the powder. It didn’t work. She danced through the

station, spinning around and I followed lead. The first one was yellow and it looked orange. “LOOK MOM! i’m Snookie!” She looked more like she was raped

by Chester Cheeto.

The next few color stations I taunted the volunteers with, “Is that all you got!? come on! GET ME!” and they took my challenge and I was covered!

Towards the end there was a old folks home/hospital and this old man sitting outside watching everyone run by. He was way off the course and kind of in the

door frame and he looked thrilled to just be sitting there watching the excitement. I yelled to Shea, “Come on! we are going off course and going to go high

five that old man!” So we did, we left the course and headed over to him and high fived him and thanked him for coming out to support us. I had no idea how

this one action would change the race for not only me, but a bunch of people that saw what we did and started cheering for Shea and I and then jumping off

course and joining in with the high fiving of the old man.
I turned around and saw a smile I can’t even describe on his face as people were lined up to just run past him, give him a hug or high five. I started to cry a

little bit and I picked up my speed thinking about the man in the wheel chair.
I put that on facebook as the highlight of the whole race and was brought to tears by my friend Bonnie who was about a mile back who said she too saw the

old man who was still getting high fives and was looking pretty colorful from all the hugs he had gotten.
Shit, just got teary writing that.

I finished the race still feeling pretty good and all smiley. There was Lester at the finish line with a smile for me. He wasn’t going to hug and kiss me this time.

Sweat is one thing, but 5 different shades of sidewalk chalk is another!

This was hands down the best race so far!

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02
Aug
I pick this song…
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random
For you, there’ll be no more crying,
For you, the sun will be shining,
And I feel that when I’m with you,
It’s alright, I know it’s right

To you, I’ll give the world
to you, I’ll never be cold
‘Cause I feel that when I’m with you,
It’s alright, I know it’s right.

And the songbirds are singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you,
Like never before.

And I wish you all the love in the world,
But most of all, I wish it from myself.

And the songbirds keep singing,
Like they know the score,
And I love you, I love you, I love you,
Like never before, like never before.

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02
Aug
…taken by the wind
Posted By: randomandodd  //  Category: Random


ipaint., originally uploaded by Random and Odd.
I am covered in paint. You would think only two colors wouldn’t be that messy, but it took me an hour to clean up and I am still digging paint out of my nails.

Lately I have been obsessed with birds. Well, it’s been since I started skydiving that the obsession started, but now if it’s an owl or a bird…I am trying to

figure out a logical reason to take it home.
Now that I am designing a new place, I wanted to make sure that the birds had a spot in my new life. I found a picture in World Mart that looked something like

this and I took a picture of it so I can reproduce it. The cost of the canvas to have this as one picture would have been too much money so I decided to break

it up into 3 pictures. It cost me 10 bucks for the canvases and 2 bucks for the paint. The one in World Mart was 88.

Now I am debating paint color for the walls. I was hell bent on this blue paint, but now I am thinking a soft creme color would go better with the rugs and

couches.
Yes, I decided to go with rugs instead of dark carpet. Cost and drama has put my grand plan on hold until everyone is a bit calmer about changes.

I gave my 30 day notice yesterday so there is no turning back now. I’m still a bit freaked out. The girls start school the 4 days before the move and I am

uncertain on how to pull it all off. I’m not worried about the packing because in the last couple of years I have gotten pretty good at packing up other people’s

shit and my own and getting it into a tight space. What I am worried most about is those quiet moments I cherish. Not feeling like I have to talk or entertain

someone. Those days when leaving out the coffee cup and lounging in my PJ’s is all I want to do. Not having anyone ask me to drive somewhere or asking if I

want to go anywhere. I don’t want to feel guilty for just wanting to be left alone. It’s amazing how 3 glorious years of being single can alter ones DNA when it

comes to freedom of being alone.
I know I shouldn’t be freaking out too much, I am in love with a man who values the same things. He has his shop he can play in and I will have my stu-stu-

studio.

This is a whole new chapter in my book of life and I will get through this if I can remember to breath, know I am loved and not worry so much about it. I worry

though.

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